View from the top of the monument. It was tall. There were a lot of stairs. I need to run more. I know I've said that already, but mostly likely doing it would be more beneficial than talking about it. I'll look into that.
DW asked me: "Doc, in all the time you had soldiers telling you things, did you ever once believe them when they started with "See, it was like this..."? Because if you did, I have a very nice bridge for sale..."
So, once upon a time, in the freezing remains of an abandoned and possibly haunted mental hospital, a soldier sidled up to me. We'll call him M.
M: See, it was like this [emphasis mine], we were just trying to have a little fun [also a phrase to be treated with deep suspicion], like a water slide, only with ice, and now Jameson's got his arse froze to it, so can you come and unfreeze him? I hear vodka's good for that.
The vodka should've been my tip off. In my defense, the rest of his story, given the people involved, was completely believable. Why he thought I had vodka, that's a mystery for the ages, but when I got back from talking to Jameson (unfrozen), I found M eyeing up a bottle of alcohol like he was wondering how it would taste. He'd also pocketed a number of tongue depressors.
We had a talk. Evidently it did't stick, because two weeks later...
M: See it was like this, Doc. I got bit by a bat and now I think I'm turning into a vampire and I don't have any garlic. Do you have some garlic?
The next week...
M, face covered in god knows what: Doc, I'll be honest, sometimes a man just needs to exfoliate.
I still don't know what it was, but the resulting rash was surprisingly difficult to get rid of.
-
In a Disused Graveyard
Robert Frost
The living come with grassy tread
To read the gravestones on the hill;
The graveyard draws the living still,
But never anymore the dead.
The verses in it say and say:
"The ones who living come today
To read the stones and go away
Tomorrow dead will come to stay."
So sure of death the marbles rhyme,
Yet can't help marking all the time
How no one dead will seem to come.
What is it men are shrinking from?
It would be easy to be clever
And tell the stones: Men hate to die
And have stopped dying now forever.
I think they would believe the lie.
78 comments:
Those pictures are lovely John, I can't believe you got weather like that today!
Sleep well all of you.
Alright, Doc, I give. I've been sitting here trying to make the connection between alcohol, tongue depressors, garlic, and a rash, but I'm drawing a blank.
Not sure he ever got the alcohol, but there was definitely garlic in whatever he'd put on his face. You could smell it a mile off. I think he may also have been brushing his teeth with it. The aim, I believe, was to deter someone's affections. At any rate, he had astonishing success there, whether he intended to or not.
Worryingly, I never found out what the tongue depressors were for.
Sorry, that probably should've been in the post. I think I'm too tired to be telling stories tonight.
*giggling madly*
Well, that's definitely brightened my evening! Have a good night, gentlemen. :)
AnonyBob - don't worry, It's rain and gales again now!
John, as well as, "See, it was like this..." How many people tried the, "Oh, no, I'm fine, really, nothing to see here!" after they were doing something they really shouldn't have been? Or when they were trying not to be sidelined?
John - My parents are currently giving me highly concerned looks while I attempt to smother my giggles in my crochet project. Oh. My. Goodness.
Greg - I haven't had a chance to catch up on your blog yet, but I am so sorry to hear about your mother. I'm glad to hear that she's doing better, and hope that this was a sharp wake-up call about her life.
I'm glad that both of you (and the boys) have been there for each other, through the ups and downs of the past month. You're such a sweet, loving family. :)
All - My apologies about disappearing for the past month. Between the six essays (they're done; I'll find out in January), annoying coworkers, malfunctioning computers, and my boss' announcement that she's leaving the company at the end of the month, I'm on the verge of a nasty breakdown. I don't know if I'm going crazy/paranoid, but I'm...concerned that I will be exposed to mental and emotional abuse from my coworkers once my boss leaves. Or maybe nothing will change, and I'm just imagining things. God, I hope that's it's just me, going insane.
~A from NW
A - I really hope your boss leaving doesn't mean your co-workers will be arseholes to you. Unfortunately I suppose it's one of those things you just can't know in advance. Is there anyone you can talk to about it - even your departing boss - for ideas/solidarity/insurance?
And thanks. I hope it's a wake-up call too. I...well, I've got worries in that respect, but much like you, I just have to wait and see.
Greg - I don't know if I dare to have that conversation within company walls, even with my departing boss. The other person I could talk to is on vacation in Scotland right now. Everyone else, I don't really trust. I'm scared that my boss is going to just tell me to "buck up" which is sensible because I'm going to be the only person responsible for Quality Control for this company once she leaves (and I've been on the job 9.5 months, which is enough to know the ropes, but not be totally confident about it). And... and it's the upper management I'm terrified of, and a handful of others in the company of 33. And my own temper and professionalism when it comes to being bullied. I tend to react really badly to being pushed around.
I'm afraid to talk to my parents about this because they'll just tell me to either take it or quit, and I'm scared that quitting my first job before I reach the 12-month mark is going to scar my resume and make me unhirable for life. (I'm freaking out over this, I know.) I just... not being able to sleep and having mini-panic attacks at this time of the year does not bring back good memories. I'm so sorry that I'm spilling this out on your blog, especially when you've got so much bigger and important things to worry about. I just. I don't know where else to turn to as an Anon. I'm hoping that having it out there will let me let it go.
~A from NW
Hi A, not sure it will help a great deal, but I, and I'm pretty certain a number of others on here, can understand how you feel. Maybe not from the exact circumstances, but the general feeling of isolation and inability to talk to anyone. No-one has the right to bully you, however you react to it.
I can fully understand why you wouldn't want to quit your job at this stage, but taking all the crap that's handed out won't be easy, so if you can find someone to support you. Maybe try talking to your parents (we can sometimes surprise our offspring - although saying that I never talk about such things to my own mother).
And I don't think J & L would mind me saying that even if they have major worries there are others on here who will happily provide a friendly face.
I hope the weather's cleared a bit Greg and you don't have puddles you could lose a small child in to deal with this morning!
A from nw - you sound like you're doing it hard at the minute, I'm so sorry :-( like SH says you'll find people around here are pretty good at helping each other when they need it,
Have as good a day as you can given the weather everyone :-)
A - I'm sure a few of us have had similar experiences, in one way or another. We'll all help any way we can.
It was nice early this morning in my part of London, it could be snowing cats and dogs at the moment for all I know! Am stuck in a windowless room in lectures all day, decidely unimpressed.
A - I'm so sorry you're going through a stressful and upsetting time, and I know you're unwilling to talk to your parents/coworker but just someone to listen and not judge will help you feel less overwhelmed. Bullying is unacceptable and extremely unprofessional, no matter how senior they are to you.
AfNW--I can understand you feeling that just quitting your current job would look bad, but there's really no reason you can't quietly start job hunting. Leaving one job for another, even after less than a year, doesn't look bad on a resume unless you do it several times in a row. Even if you don't find something right away, you'll feel better knowing you're doing something about it--and if things work out better than you expect, you don't have to take a new job offer when you get it! And be sure to get your departing boss's new contact info (for recommendation purposes).
hows work Greg? is it treating you well?
hows your day going John?
I'm mainly unbelievably tired and trying to keep a headache at bay (andfailing). How'e you?
that's rubbish :-( I'm not sure there isn't a bug going round that has those symptoms, they seem to be quite common at the minute, not that that helps I know.
Today is a very wet day, a bucket and a boat would come in very handy if you have one ;-)
I hope you feel beter soon :-)
A - I'm sorry. It sounds like a very difficult situation and from the little you've said here many of your co-workers sound like...well, unpleasant people. So I can see why you're worried. You're a strong person and I know you'll get through this, but I'm sorry you have to cope with it. Life is just bloody unfair sometimes.
Pip - I once had someone insist his arm wasn't broken even though we could both see the bone. This was just after his mate had tried the see-it-was-like-this routine in an attempt to convince me it hadn't happened as a result of them trying to form a human pyramid...even though half the base must've seen them.
L - coffee?
I don't think the weather is helping - I think I've got one coming too. And stress won't make it any easier.
I think I've just seen a large boat with pairs of animals walking up the gangplank.
Glad to say we're in a 'looks like rain' stage again, as opposed to 'raining'. Vry dark skies...
Danger...would you believe I don't feel like a coffee? But if you're about we could...avoid the impending rain together, somehow.
Sensibly, I'd keep working because this will never get done if I don't do it. But since when has sensible been the right option?
I lied, its raining again.
Change of plan, sorry. Mrs N just called. Sherlock's ill, I need to go and pick him up. Hope you don't have what he has.
John, Norovirus is going around, I really hope it isn't that but just watch out...
I hope he's ok John.
Givehim a hug from me
I hope he feels better soon--refu'ah sh'laymah, Sherlock. (And I hope you manage to keep your headache at bay, L.)
Thanks, guys. And I will, L. He's not too bad - definitely ill, but still able to ask for cake, even if I don't think he'd actually be able to eat it.
Mrs N said she was worried because he was 'so very quiet' with this wondering look on her face like it's never happened before...
Let me know if you need anything bringing home, and suitable dinner options.
No wonder she was worried! Quietness is clearly a serious sign of...something.
Thanks, love. How are you doing?
like it's never happened before...
ENTHUSIASTIC... :)
Yeah, ok. How's he now he's home? He got a temp or anything? Or just under the weather?
Low temp, yeah. Headache, misery, General crabbiness.
Symptoms of being an adult, most of those ;)
Not sure if we can have got an illness that causes headaches and not a lot else.
I had a nosebleed... refuse to Google that as it'll claim ive had a brain haemorrhage or fractured my skull or something.
Never Google medical problems, that way lies madness. I think he'll probably be fine tomorrow, and hopefully you will too. It has stopped bleeding, right?
It's the worst when the small people we love aren't well. One of mine was violently ill on Saturday. So far it seems she didn't share (touching wood).
It's bad when our big people are ill, but the smalls just seem so much...smaller.
Yeah, stopped. I'm not recreating the shining in my office.
I Google before talking to you, to be able to say it's not the worst cases scenarios.
Give my regards to Sherlock. I'm laid up with a rotten cold too, and I just got chewed out by my doctor's PA for not taking my asthma inhalers enough.
I hope he feels better soon. I've seen that startled confusion on a small child's face before. Right before he threw up...
rsf
Is he looking startled or confused, Danger?
I might drag myself hone soon. Put in any requests for dinner sooner rather than.later
I hope you and Sherlock are both ok Greg :-) illness is horrid and being ill while your little people are ill is even worse.
Doc, try and stay healthy until these two are better ;-)
Sounds like a good idea. I hope you feel better soon too, L. And I hope Sherlock is feeling less miserable.
(Right now I'm very grateful to Imitrex. Again.)
L - not particularly startled, mildly confused. Don't worry about dinner, Mrs Hudson says she'll make us something. Any requests?
No, just tell her not to be offended if I don't eat it.
RR - so you've gone from never having had a migraine to having them all the time?
5 times in 4 months isn't ALL the time, is it?
(My doctor thinks I was having them before, but was misidentifying them as sinus headaches. And my main trigger seems to be barometric pressure changes. How do I avoid THAT?)
How does chicken noodle soup sound? It usually stays down. (Jewish penicillin!)
Rereading with a few more braincells engaged I see it was Mrs N who was confused.
Seconding soup for supper. And saltines.
rsf
L's home... looking rather gray and still set on doing paperwork.
RR - no, I wouldn't say it was 'all the time'. It was the way you said 'again' on the end of your post - I've no idea how often you get them! It just sounded like you thought it was a lot.
As for misidentifying them...I suppose it depends on what they're like. everyone seems to have different migraines. I certainly couldn't mistake mine for anything, because I feel sick as a dog and my vision goes funny. Nothing else does that.
As for dinner, nothing sounds good right now. Eating at all sounds fairly horrible.
(oops, caught by the doc...)
I often know when my mate is going to have a migraine before he does, he goes a very particular shade of grey.
L. I hope you and Sherlock both feel better soon.
Lancs. Anon
Sherlock is very subdued. And cuddly. John is just cuddly. And does that surreptitious doctoring like kissing my forehead in a lingering way, using his thermometer-lips... (hope he doesn't use them on anyone but us lot!)
Lancs Anon - yeah, L does too.
L - I'm only checking! And neither of you will keep a thermometer in your mouth long enough unless you're a lot worse off than you are right now.
Shhhh, I'm always grey. It's my natural look.
I'm not feeling well enough to suggest other temperature-sensing-body-parts you could put in my mouth...
(of course I mean his tongue. What were you lot thinking??)
Ah! I said "again" because I had a bad one yesterday. Caught today's earlier so not as bad. (I didn't think they were migraines because I didn't see halos or auras or anything like that. Just sensitive to light and vision going blurry--and pain, but that's what headaches are. And OTC pain killers usually worked. Now they don't work any more.)
I hope John relieved you of all paperwork, at least for the next bit. Feel better!
Lestrade is being too noisy
His noise consists of... breathing. I don't don't he's going to get much quieter. ( He and Sherlock are curled up on the sofa together under multiple blankets.)
That sounds very sweet.
At least both your patients are together, should make treatment simpler.
That does like you have two very uncomfortable people there, John.
he should learn to breath just with the other lung and anyway it's not that his heart is beating REALLLLLLLLY loudly. and sometimes he gurgles.
You make it sound like I purposefully gurgle. I can't help my largely-formed-of-liquids body occasionally moving some around and inadvertently making a noise only audible to people with their heads pressed against my body!
Sherlock, Lestrade - I hope you both feel better soon. And that you both get some proper rest - it sounds very cosy, snuggled up in the blankets on the sofa.
John - I hope your patients go easy on you :-)
Have you managed to get them to fall asleep, John? (My hopes being raised by the lull in complaints--er, comments. :))
(From Sherlock.)
(And if you can't complain when you feel miserable, when can you? :))
Asleep or just resting their eyes...only time and snores will tell.
resting. trying not to breathe or have a pulse for his lordship.
...but I'm going to have to go for a wee, so John may have to rescue me from under a sleepy 7 yr old...
I think I'm going to take him up to bed.
Sherlock, or Lestrade?
i can't express how unfair it is that he has an early night and I don't feel up to taking advantage of his nanny...I mean, that situation.
Nameless - ha, maybe both them of them...
sure you're not coming down with anything, Danger? Or just typing on your phone with one arm full of Sherlock?
Want to come and be my fnug on the sofa? I promise to breathe quietly...
John - it does sound like Lestrade wouldn't mind being put to bed (even if all he'd do once he got there was sleep) :-p
Lestrade - not even up to being taken advantage of? You're right, that's just not fair.
I don't know, your heart's pretty loud... Guess I'll risk it though.
I shall respond to that accusation via the medium of song. And a blog post.
You know Sherlock's not feeling himself when he doesn't want to try using a stethoscope to tell the difference between not-healthy-sounding lungs and healthy ones. I hope he sleeps tonight. You too, L. And I'm glad John is there to take care of both of you.
rsf
My lungs are as healthy as an ex-smoker city-dweller can be (not very, I assume.)
Still probably makes them better than mine. Stupid asthma. (Adjective adjusted for seven year old eyes.)
rsf
I'm sorry that you are all under the weather, but the noisy sofa -cuddling is basically the most adorable thing ever. I love you guys. <33333
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