Thursday, June 20, 2013

this is murray

Hey this is Murray, Watson's making help him weed the allotment (what is my payment?? I DON'T WANT CHARD, jesus who wants chard??) so I'm stealing his phone and trying to do this post thing. Typing loads on this keyboard is not the easiest thing in the world and he's going to see me in a minute. I mean, I have a smart phone and all but I don't use it to write f***king novels on unlike some people. Do you want to know how lon g it took me to find the star key just then?

In case anyone cares about my life apart from my mum I have two job interviews coming up, one with a perfectly normal London hospital and one with 3C's boss because she called me out of the blue and told me to be at an address at a time and I think I should go because even Watson seems possibly genuinely a bit scared of her. Army still owns my soul for now oh shit he's seen me gotta post fast

76 comments:

REReader said...

Good luck on both interviews, Murray! (I think you should go to Mrs. Holmes' interview, not because she's scary but because her job offer to John worked out rather well, ultimately... :)

(Hey, chard is perfectly fine!)

Greg Lestrade said...

Mrs H wants you? The army may be about to lose your soul. And she'll be keeping your afterlife on account too.

pandabob said...

good luck with the interviews Murray but keep an eye on who else just happens to turn up, Mrs H seems to work in very mysterious ways ;-)

Murray said...

I don't know what she wants! I checked out the address, it's not even a proper building.

rsf said...

Oooh, a mystery! How can you resist?

Greg Lestrade said...

Even if it wasn't a mystery he couldn't resist - mrs H is irresistible ;)

Anon Without A Name said...

Hey Murray, good to see life's treating you well :-)

Good luck with the interviews - especially the one with Mrs H. I mean, I'm sure it'll be fine. What's the worst that could happen... actually, don't answer that. Don't even think about it. I'm sure you'll have fun, whatever it is she wants you to do :-)

Greg Lestrade said...

Nameless - he has nothing to fear. I mean, unless he's got any skeletons in his closet.... Then he's beyond help :)

(Maybe she wants you as a gardener, Murray? Danger says you were wonderful on the allotment today. Enjoying your chard?

murray said...

What's the worst that could happen...

She might eat me.

Greg - that chard is his revenge. What the hell do you even do with chard?

Greg Lestrade said...

Curry? Fegato di Vitello? Char Sui pork? Salad? Soup? Pie? Frittatas? Chardy Cheese?

I could go on, but you probably don't want me to...

Another name for it is perpetual spinach...it may well be perpetual! :)

Murray said...

Just don't tell me you make cupcakes out of it. That'd be a chard too far.

Greg Lestrade said...

I can make a lovely chard and apple pie...but not cupcakes, no. Yet.

Anonymous said...

I love chard, but what the heck is "Chardy Cheese"?

Good luck with the interviews, Murray - I'm sure there's nothing to worry about!! :)

LyricalSinger

Greg Lestrade said...

like cauliflower cheese, but chardy...

blanch your chard leaves and stems (seperately). Knock out a cheese sauce - onions, mustard, cheddar, goat's cheese, pepper, butter, flour, milk - combine, chuck a few breadcrumbs over the top, cook off and eat!

John H. D. Watson said...

Would you make that some time? It sounds really good.

rsf said...

I don't even like chard and that sounds good.

Greg Lestrade said...

of course I'll make it! Anything for you :)

Shall we look at suits on Tuesday?

Kestrel337 said...

Murray, I'm with you. My reward for working someone else's garden would be that they keep the chard! And the zucchinis, too (but flower starts or asparagus would be acceptable).

John H. D. Watson said...

L - That'd be great - both the suits and the cheese. I mean chard. :)

Greg Lestrade said...

Cheesy suits?

John H. D. Watson said...

Suits made out of chard?

Greg Lestrade said...

We probably have enough of it.

SPeaking of leaves. And...well, leaves.

Caterpillars eat a lot, don't they? And shit a lot! I'm...surprised. Mainly by the crap. Which is stupid, because if nettles go in, I guess crap comes out...and they certainly put a lot of nettles in.

We're going to have to cut them some fresh just to eat.

John H. D. Watson said...

They really, really do. It's basically all they've done so far. We're definitely going to need more nettles.

Greg Lestrade said...

Quite nice to watch them, now Sherlock's head isn't obscuring the tank.

They're so...busy. Walking about, eating...I don't know. Never really thought about what caterpillars do.

REReader said...

It's sort of like they're pregnant with their own future selves, isn't it? They're growing butterflies!

John H. D. Watson said...

I suppose that's their only job - eat enough to have the energy to turn into a butterfly.

Greg Lestrade said...

Yeah. And they're like the degus - eating one thing, then very suddenly leaving it, determined to go and eat another, identical thing, for no apparent reason...You'd think it'd be better just to sit and eat everything around you, before moving. But they don't.

...it hadn't occurred to me that we will have to clean out caterpillar poo either.

John H. D. Watson said...

I wonder if butterflies poo that much.

Greg Lestrade said...

I wonder how on earth we're going to persuade Sherlock to set them free, and not keep them, like some butterfly overlord, ruling their lives...

John H. D. Watson said...

Or cover the entire allotment with netting.

Small Hobbit said...

From wedding suits to caterpillar poo in three easy steps. It's amazing what topics these blogs cover.

Greg Lestrade said...

SHould have got silk worms - they could have made us suits!

I think we have to give him a strict time limit, at which point they will be liberated.

He can always get more, if he wants to spend his pocket money, or have them as a present for some occasion.

He did ask if we could have butterflies at the wedding. I said I thought that was beginning to stray away from 'simple'. He also asked for fireworks, a swimming pool, a chocolate fountain, a bouncy castle and a hot air balloon.

Anon Without A Name said...

I misread that as "a hot air baboon"... which would certainly be straying some distance away from 'simple'.

Greg Lestrade said...

definitely no baboons! :)

i'm knackered. night all.

REReader said...

definitely no baboons! :)

How about a tiger? :D

Anonymous said...

I vote for bouncy castle. One time a few years ago, a bunch of us late-20-somethings rented out a space that had 5 different bouncy castles of various kinds. That may have been the best two hours of my adult life.

kholly said...

I don't know, the 4 of you and a minister (or registrar or whatever it takes) in a hot air balloon doing the wedding might be kind of nice.

Small Hobbit said...

They'd still need witnesses though kholly, as even if Mycroft can act as one, I doubt Sherlock would be able to. Maybe Murray could be the second witness and keep an eye on Sherlock at the same time, in case he decided to experiment with anything.

Greg Lestrade said...

You can't get married anywhere that doesn't have a licence. It's quite strictly controlled. Hot air balloons aren't included :)

rsf said...

Too bad. A balloon wedding would be amazing. Maybe you can just go for a ride to celebrate the end of exams for Mycroft.

Greg Lestrade said...

In honestly entirely happy with the place we've chosen.

Imagine the fear of dropping a ring in a hot air balloon.

REReader said...

Imagine the fear of dropping a ring in a hot air balloon

O_O

(Chocolate, in or out of fountains, is always nice, though... :))

Greg Lestrade said...

Chocolate fountains need oil adding to the chocolate though. I'd rather just eat chocolate...

We haven't decided about catering yet. We haven't decided much, obviously, soooo.... That's probably not a surprise.

Greg Lestrade said...

It's very odd when you're all quiet. Makes me feel like the world might have ceased to exist outside my office.

Hope you're all doing nice things.

Mycroft, hope your exam went well.

REReader said...

I can't speak for anyone else--and in fact, I doubt it's true of most anyone else commenting here!--but my Fridays are always crazy busy, what with preparing for Shabbat. But it's nice to hear another human voice (even if it's not actually hearing and not actually a voice...;D) *waves at L*

pandabob said...

its a conspiracy to make you worry Greg ;-)

I hope you're nearly done for the day :-)

Greg Lestrade said...

Not nearly enough - but getting there.

I love looking forward to going home these days. Just one more reason I know I'm the luckiest bloke around.

REReader said...

:)


Have you big plans for the weekend (John's Saturday night shift allowing)?

Kestrel337 said...

That's a good feeling to have. It's a good feeling to know you've helped cause too, speaking as the homemaker in my family.

Blessed Solstice! I'm off to a nearby natural spring to gather ritual water for the coming wheel of the year. I'll think of Sherlock's caterpillars while I'm dodging nettles!

Small Hobbit said...

Quiet - maybe; punch drunk, more like, having just spent most of the last three days in budget meetings. I'm about to break open the wine to celebrate the start of the weekend. Anyone care to join me?

Sherlock said...

I've got chocolate milk not wine pleeeeaaaase can we go and see the whale Lestrade John says yes if you say yes and he said if we're going down that way I need new swimming shorts and maybe clothes and please can we and we can go and have breakfast first.

Greg Lestrade said...

I'll talk to John when I'm home. We probably can.

REReader said...

I would choose chocolate milk over wine, myself. :)

Is this the whale you're wanting to see, Sherlock?

Sherlock said...

Yes that one and it would be better if it was real but I bet it will still be good even though it's not.

REReader said...

It does look amazingly life-like--and an advantage of it not being real is not having to worry that it will die, which is good. I hope it works out so you can go see it and then tell us what it's like.

Sherlock said...

but if it was dead then you would really be able to look at it! Except Lestrade said if it was dead the head would belong to the king and the tail to the queen and we don't even have a king so that's stupid and they should give it to me.

REReader said...

Oh, but if it were dead already they wouldn't leave it there to look at, it would get all smelly.

Are there any aquariums in the London area with living whales?

John H. D. Watson said...

I think they did a whale on one of those enormous animal autopsy programmes, didn't they? I seem to remember someone crawling inside one.

Greg Lestrade said...

It wouldn't fit in the flat, Sherlock.

You'll have to hope the Natural History Museum gets another, and you somehow charm your way into seeing it.

Maybe one day one will wash up on a beach somewhere and we can go and see it. You still can't have it though.

I think you're right, Danger.

Sherlock said...

Mycroft Lestrade has green shorts and flip flops on and a shirt that isn't a proper shirt and he says it's flip flop day today and I hope your exam went okay and now in the summer you don't have to study and we can do things and maybe there will be a whale and I hope you see my caterpillars before they're butterflies and I want a suit for the wedding and will you help me pick one because you're better at suits than me.

Anon Without A Name said...

That whale looks fascinating, Sherlock.

Mycroft - I hope your exam went well - was it Latin today? I failed Latin :-( Too much learning by rote for me.

SH - right there with you *clinks glasses*

Greg Lestrade said...

Looking at wedding gear makes me want a nice dress - they're so pretty! And so many people have suits that are so over the top. (I know the same can be said for dresses - but I don't feel any pressure looking at those)

pandabob said...

I suspect that Mycroft would like you in the shorts and flip flops if the other option was a dress ;-)

REReader said...

I was thinking something about Mycroft and eyerolling, pandabob! :D

But wedding dresses ARE pretty, many of them, it cannot be denied.

Greg Lestrade said...

I dunno, he's an open minded young man...but he probably wouldfind it a bit too attention-grabbing for his taste. ;) Mind you, He's sort of...effortlessly stylish. The rest of us have to try rather harder!

Mycroft said...

At least a dress would be appropriate for the occasion.

pandabob said...

That is a good point Mycroft ;-)

I'm sure you'll look very stylish on the day Greg because I'm sure you'll get a lot of very useful advice from the man himself :-)

Greg Lestrade said...

You saying I can't wear flip-flops, cut-offs, a shirt and a cravat tied around my head, Mycroft? :)

I hope your day went well. Looking forward to having you home.

Want us to come and see you on Sunday?

Mycroft said...

I would prefer it if you didn't, but it is your wedding.

I'm looking forward to being home as well, and yes, please do visit on Sunday if it's convenient.

Greg Lestrade said...

Seeing you is never inconvenient. :) Although John may be a zombie. And you'll be subjected to an entire phone full of caterpillar pictures, I expect.

rsf said...

Congratulations on finishing your exams, Mycroft. Have you got any ideas for things you'd like to see or do this summer?

Anonymous said...

My recent experience with caterpillars involves driving through the Rocky Mountains and discovering that Western Tent Caterpillars have made one of their periodic invasions of the aspen trees (and aspens themselves are interesting because a) a grove of aspen is connected in the root system and is actually one giant organism and b) aspens will only grow at higher altitudes [but below tree line] and c) there's a powder on the aspen trunk that can be used as sunscreen and d) it's one of the first trees to move back into an area that's been burned by a forest fire), and many of the trees are completely without leaves, because the caterpillars have eaten them all away. We were driving along and the road was almost solidly covered with squirming little caterpillars looking for more food. Probably the closest thing to a biblical plague I've ever seen. Not sure if tent caterpillars turn into something pretty after they go into their cocoons.

I know it's part of the regular life cycle of the forest, but between the pine beetles eating the fir trees and the caterpillars eating the aspens, the forest is looking kind of bare.

-Ella

rsf said...

Ella, were you near any of the forest fires? Every time I hear from my cousins it seems like another part of the state is on fire.

Anonymous said...

I'm not. I live in Denver, which is farther from the mountains than lots of people seem to think. ;) But my Boulder friends are apparently inhaling smoke, and other friends have had to evacuate from a fire near the Spanish Peaks, and I'm supposed to take 60 out of towners on a bus trip up to Rocky Mountain National Park this weekend, where they may see both pine beetle destruction and burns. Just another summer in Colorado…

-Ella

rsf said...

I grew up in Denver, and my sister and mom are still in Centennial. It was smoky enough down there that they had to keep the house sealed for a while.

I hope your tourists see some things worth seeing. And that there's some aspen with leaves left this fall. I finally got vacation in September just to come ses it!

Anonymous said...

Ha, my mom and dad and sister are still in Centennial! I graduated from Arapahoe. (Please do not find me and stalk me thanks. :) )

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