Thursday, October 13, 2011

cocooned

It's not really necessary to get out of bed today, right? At least not until lunch time?

Our bed at home isn't bad, but this one's much superior, besides being warm and full of Lestrade and on the correct side of a locked door. I hadn't realised it was a luxury not to be jumped on by someone with small pointy elbows first thing in the morning, but it definitely is. Which doesn't stop me missing him, of course, but there you are. Human beings are contrary like that.

Hi, Sherlock. Hope you're having too much fun with your mum to be reading this. It sounded like she had some good plans for you.

Hi, Mycroft. I hope school's going well still. Maybe we can come and visit some weekend soon? We miss you.

Right, going back to sleep until L wakes up. 

100 comments:

Greg Lestrade said...

Mmmmmm, bed, sleep, lie ins, locked doors... come here.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like a lovely start to the morning. Have fun, gentlemen.

Greg Lestrade said...

It was. Is. Lazing about, then a swim, then breakfast and now we're heading into the city to do things (like buy me some boxers) and see the sights.

The pool here looks out over the big garden. It's lovely. Lots of people working out there today, weeding and tending and stuff. i think they're setting up a marquee, too. So maybe it won't be so quiet soon!

Nicky said...

John, can't you just lend him a pair of yours to shut him up? Honestly, Orio.

John H. D. Watson said...

Not after that crack about them being much too small for him, no. I'm afraid I can't do that. Anyway, he's had ample opportunity to buy more today. He just chose not to.

Greg Lestrade said...

You should be buying me more, not making me buy them! Anyway, I might have meant small because these days I live on cake and coffee, not small because you're a were-liliputian or lacking in any department.

Nicky said...

I suppose I shall survive. After all, I survived discovering you with your jeans around your ankles unconscious on the front doorstep when we were teenagers. I was scarred for life, but I survived.

John H. D. Watson said...

Oh really? Do tell...

Greg Lestrade said...

No, really, don't tell.

I have plenty to retaliate with if we get onto childhood embarrassing stories.

John H. D. Watson said...

Don't listen to him, Nicky.

And L - I said I'd buy you some! You've got to be willing to go into the shop first though, and not drag me away to swim or buy me ice cream or flirt outrageously in bookshops. Not that I can say I really mind.

Nicky said...

Well, let's just say he was very worse for wear, nonsensical, and the reason he couldn't find his keys in his pocket was that they weren't his jeans... of course he denied it all the later when coping with a horrific hangover... the Milk man looked very amused though, when he rang the doorbell to report that he'd left a pint of semi skimmed next to the half naked body on the doorstep.

John H. D. Watson said...

Ha! I don't suppose you took a picture before helping him inside like the kind sister you are?

Greg Lestrade said...

Whereas rescuing you when you got stuck on top of the fridge when you were only wearing a towel is perfectly normal, because that mouse was really out to do you harm...

Don't encourage her, John Hamish Watson. I have Harry on speed dial.

John H. D. Watson said...

Don't blame this on me! You brought it on yourself with too much talk of chafing and drafts. Also, you told the internet I suck my thumb in my sleep (still untrue), I'm not sure how much worse Harry could do.

Greg Lestrade said...

Hmmm.

I think you should be very nice to me to make up for my terribly hurt feelings. Or at least make up for the I've cream I bought you.

And what exactly was outrageous uv the bookshop??

Nicky said...

Sorry John, I didn't. Although he could recreate the moment for you.

In the days before cameras on every mobile phone people could do such things with far less embarrassment!

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure how much worse Harry could do.
Careful there John. You don't want to sound like you're offering her a challenge.

John H. D. Watson said...

Well...perhaps not outrageous. But more than your usual. Very sweet really.

Greg Lestrade said...

Huh.

It would be impossible not to flirt with you, you're so lovely.

I didn't manage to buy you a nice cookery book though, which was my aim.

If you think flirting was outrageous I presume you won't join me in a dance to their music from the garden? (it's a wedding, readers, well, a civil partnership, actually. They have a string quartet. And flowers Greg the florist would approve of.)

John H. D. Watson said...

If you can put up with my dancing, of course I will.

Greg Lestrade said...

Is it that bad? I didn't pack my steel toes.

Do you want to lead, or shall i?

John H. D. Watson said...

...Probably better if you do. I'll let you come to your own conclusions.

Greg Lestrade said...

Hah. Just because I lead you astray doesn't mean I can lead in a dance.

You must have gone to loads of posh mess dinners in the army, all dressed up! I'm more mosh pit than foxtrot.

John H. D. Watson said...

Heh. Sorry to spoil your illusions, but no, not really many at all, and also it's completely possible to go to events where dancing is occurring and...you know, not do that. You know all that wine stuff, I thought you'd know how to dance too.

Greg Lestrade said...

I know how to dance to the sort of music that string quartets don't play.

But this is romantic , right? I mean, more than a sweaty club where everyone's tripping and drunk.

Wine stuff is because wine is important and expensive. Dancing isn't.

But it's nice, with you. Even with no boxers on. Specially with no boxers on?

John H. D. Watson said...

Have you entirely given up dancing in sweaty clubs?

Greg Lestrade said...

Not on purpose. But it's been a few years. And now everyone would think I was someone's dad. Grey hair and sweaty clubs don't go hand in hand. Unless it's a health club running over 60s aerobic classes.

John H. D. Watson said...

Pity. I think I'd like to see you doing that sort of dancing.

Greg Lestrade said...

Danger, for you, anything.

We shall go to the sweatiest, gayest club, playing the dirtiest tunes, and dance like nobody's watching.

John H. D. Watson said...

What have I got myself into...

As long as you realise I would've been out of place anywhere with a mosh pit even when I was twenty.

Ria said...

You guys are too adorable. My pancreas is lodging a protest.

Greg Lestrade said...

Where did you go?

And don't worry, I won't let go of you for a moment. Some places people will try and cop off with anything that isn't tied down. Actually, some places they'll cop with anything that IS tied down. But I won't take you anywhere like that.

(Of course, if you'd gone to proper clubs as a youngster, we could have met twenty years ago...heh. We'll have to make up for lost time.)

John H. D. Watson said...

I went to the pub, or other people's flats. Or the library.

if you'd gone to proper clubs as a youngster, we could have met twenty years ago

You would've even have noticed me. I'd have been off in the corner somewhere with a pint, probably wearing a jumper.

Greg Lestrade said...

Yeah, but you would have noticed me. Well...I dunno, actually, by the time I was 25 I had calmed down a bit.

At twenty I'd have been getting in someone's face and being beaten up outside. At which point you would have come and tended to my bleeding face and broken heart...hah.

So ever get up to anything in the library?

Ria - romance is in the air, here! Those two young blokes down there in their matching suits and matching smiles and matching rings. It's lovely!

John H. D. Watson said...

Heh. Starting another romance novel, are you? Actually that set up sounds a little more likely than most of the others.

So ever get up to anything in the library?

Oh, yeah. Study breaks are very important, you know.

It's lovely!

It really is. They look so happy.

Ria said...

That's wonderful. I always get so smiley and wistful when I see a happy LGBT couple being affectionate with each other, because it gives me hope that someday I'd be able to walk hand in hand with my girlfriend in the depressing little American town that I'm temporarily living in, without having to worry about it.

Sorry, I'm bringing down the mood. Go and have obnoxious, adorable PDAs with your boyfriend!

Greg Lestrade said...

We're not being P about our DAs. Well, only on here. We're in our room with the windows open, watching people in posh frocks and suits mill about with champagne.

(I did notice, when looking for hotels, that this one hosted weddings and civil partnerships. One of the reasons I chose it - figured we'd avoid any surprises if they're used to same-sex couples. I hope either you leave your temporary town, for somewhere you feel more comfortable, or that the inhabitants change their attitudes.)

John H. D. Watson said...

Ria - someday. Maybe even someday soon. Although I hope you get to leave that town even sooner. From what you've said it sounds pretty unpleasant.

Greg Lestrade said...

hang on...another romance novel and sounds a little more likely than most of the others. There are no others! Unless you mean yours...

Want champagne? I could go and get champagne.

John H. D. Watson said...

I'll come with. You're not going to make off with one of the bottles from the wedding, are you?

Back to the Fuchsia is entirely yours! I just write bits of it. Tiny bits.

Greg Lestrade said...

You think I'm some sort of cheapskate, won't shell out for a nice bottle of bubbly for my gorgeous boyfriend??

I was going to...offer my congratulations, maybe, and if I got offered a bottle, I wouldn't have said no.

It's at least half yours! More than half. 75%, I'd say.

John H. D. Watson said...

Ha. Then you'd definitely better take me, you might need a diversion.

40% at most!

Greg Lestrade said...

you'd definitely better take me

Don't tempt me, Danger.

60%.

John H. D. Watson said...

When we get back. Come on, we can practise our DAs in P.

45%.

Greg Lestrade said...

All right. If there's a slow dance I may be forced to drag you to the dance floor...we can sway rhythmically, even if we can't dance.

55%

John H. D. Watson said...

50/50 then.

I promise not to step on your toes.

Greg Lestrade said...

50/50, deal.

If anyone down there asks I'm telling them you're an underwear model, though.

John H. D. Watson said...

Then I'm telling them you're a cattle rustler.

Greg Lestrade said...

I....I don't even want to imagine how we met.

John H. D. Watson said...

On my Australian fashion tour, obviously. Must've had something to do with AussieBum.

Greg Lestrade said...

So you were on a ranch doing a photoshoot, and I decided to rustle me some beefcake, instead of the usual beef?

John H. D. Watson said...

What, you think they might not find that completely believable?

Greg Lestrade said...

We'll find out, c'mon. I've bloody gone undercover for the Met with worse stories than that. Bet you a pair of boxers I can make someone believe us.

John H. D. Watson said...

Ha! I'll take that bet, let's go.

Anonymous said...

What, you think they might not find that completely believable?

It's about as believable as how you really did meet. You could tell them the truth, it's entertaining enough.

Enjoy the bubbly and the good atmosphere and the DA whether P or not.

John H. D. Watson said...

kholly - that is a very good point.

Greg Lestrade said...

Well the lady I was just talking to completely believes your name is really Danger and you were an underwear model until a traumatic incident with a garter belt, a Texas Longhorn and a live news feed to Brazil. But I've told her you don't really like talking about it.

John H. D. Watson said...

I'm sure I wouldn't like talking about it, so that's just as well! But have you introduced your cattle rustling past?

Greg Lestrade said...

Danger, it's as if you WANT to lose the bet.

Undercover work is all about the drip feed of information. She's already told two other people about you. I will soon tell someone else about me, then allow the two pieces of information to intertwine.

So eager, you are.

Just wait until I tell someone about your Wizard-troubles...

John H. D. Watson said...

...What?

Greg Lestrade said...

Your Wizerd-troubles. The Were-Liliputian spell you're under. I'll tell them I'm trying to find the antidote, that's why I gave up the rustling.

John H. D. Watson said...

...You're completely mad, you know that? And ridiculous. I love you.

Greg Lestrade said...

Madly in love with you.

As Nicky said, it's her fault. I used to make stories up for them all the time. We'd all get in one bed and I'd tell them stupid stories about people in the village to distract them from whatever else was going on in the house.

That woman behind you, staring at your arse? I told her you were the inspiration for Wonder-Bum pants. Ignore her.

John H. D. Watson said...

That's completely adorable. No wonder you're so good at doing the voices when you tell Sherlock stories.

Are Wonder-Bum pants even a real thing?


......She's just pinched me. Bit hard to ignore.

Greg Lestrade said...

In that case I shall be forced to wrap myself around you to fend off further attacks. I shall lasso you and drag you toward me, to keep up the rustling cover. I think my accent is returning, with all these locals around. They'll easily believe my side of this story.

I think they're a real thing, but for women.

John H. D. Watson said...

Your accent ought to be Australian!

What have you been undercover as?

Greg Lestrade said...

I was just visiting...got deported. Or stowed away on a ship back...

Just scumbags. It's not like any of the jobs I've done have required me to be an upstanding member of the community with a good job. And no one's ever disbelieved my portrayal of a drunk, drugged, waster. Wonder why?

John H. D. Watson said...

Clearly because of your superior acting skills. Did you really just tell that man I was Daniel Craig's bum double?

Greg Lestrade said...

he didn't doubt it for a moment.

And the couple over there, with the dyed hair and the piercings, I told them we met when you were doing a photoshoot for a specialist mag, wearing a chromed cock cage, and I was jobbing as a locksmith, and got called in when they broke the key. Told them you'd been stuck for three days before you gave in and let them get help. They both nodded like they understood.

John H. D. Watson said...

You did not!

...I'm quite glad I don't know any of these people.

Greg Lestrade said...

I'm quite glad they've given us a bottle of champagne.

So, who won the bet? We can retire to our room, drink champagne and think about all the jobs you've had...

(I did.)

John H. D. Watson said...

You did. I will buy you as many boxers as you like.

I'd have given us a bottle of champagne too after that story, just out of sympathy. I demand a dance before we go back up though. With no one but you pinching my Wonder Bum.

mazarin221b said...

Did...did you guys just crash a wedding reception?

WELL DONE, SIRS. My hat is off to you.

Greg Lestrade said...

Oooh, demanding.

Come on then, dance me to the wedding now, dance me on and on, dance me very tenderly and dance me very long, we're both of us beneath our love, we're both of us above...

John H. D. Watson said...

It wasn't crashing so much as...chatting and sidling toward the buffet?

He's singing out loud though, so I imagine either we'll be asked to leave or he's going to be asked up on stage...

Greg Lestrade said...

We're leaving.

I don't think they want me singing.

And yes, not crashing. They offered us the champagne. After some gentle powers of suggestion.

John H. D. Watson said...

Well, they're very silly people. I like your singing.

Anon Without A Name said...

OMFG. I second Mazarin's hat-doffing. Well played, guys. Well played :-)

Greg Lestrade said...

Mmm. Maybe you're a silly person. Must be, to go out with someone so ridiculous.

My voice sounds like it belongs to someone who smoked too much for too long. Rough.

C'mon. Missions accomplished. I'll pick a pair of boxers I like...

John H. D. Watson said...

You won't need them till tomorrow.

Greg Lestrade said...

Hah, I know.

And I'm...I don't know, happy? grateful? pleased? that your pyjams have had very little to do this holiday, too. I hope you don't feel uncomfortable, because I really don't mind if you want to wear them, at all.

John H. D. Watson said...

I think I've never been more comfortable.

Elizabeth said...

WELL DONE, Lestrade. My hat is also doffed. I'm glowing a little bit with all this cuteness.

Although the "traumatic incident with a garter belt, a Texas Longhorn and a live news feed to Brazil" almost killed me. My university's mascot is the Texas Longhorn, so I choose to picture this incident on its campus.

Anonymous said...

John and Greg - If anyone asks me why I can't stop smiling tonight, I'm blaming it on you both.

*giggling* I'm glad you're having a great time!

-A from NW

Greg Lestrade said...

Ha, you lot are great.

And thinking about it, technically they crashed our romantic getaway with their wedding...

Ria said...

That was masterful, gentlemen. I salute you, your champagne, and your Wonder-Bums.

Re: my small depressing town-- I'm out of here in less than a year, and then I'm going on walkabout. I'm starting out teaching the various languages that I'm learning in China next fall, then heading to France, Jordan, Morocco, and anywhere else I can afford to get to.

John H. D. Watson said...

Yes, how dare they give us this...actually really good champagne? Mmm.

John H. D. Watson said...

Ria - that sounds like an excellent time! I hope you'll tell us about it once you get going.

Desert Wanderer said...

You two are a hoot. :D Sounds like you're having a well-deserved blast.

On a totally-unrelated note: Tink, did you escape the alleged tornado? My VA geography isn't quite up to snuff yet, so I'm not sure if it was where you are...

Greg Lestrade said...

Ria - sounds great! Pop over to London too, eh?

Tink - I hope you escaped any tornados too.

Danger - it was very nice champagne. I hope your head won't hurt when you wake up. And I hope you don't really think that you don't show me you love me enough. You do. And I hope that I show you enough too, which maybe I'm not, if you're unsure about it. But I do really really love you.

Tink said...

DW & Greg: Yes, I escaped it. I'm closer to the nation's capital than Mineral, VA. However, those poor people can't catch a break. They had their 38th aftershock (it was a 3.0 aftershock). Then got hit by a tornado. Ugh. (However, I was under a tornado watch for a while. I ignored it and it went away.)

So all in all, I'm fine! I'm glad you (J&G) are having such a good time! I too doff my hat to the pair of you and salute your courage and silver tongued guile!

...Every time I try to re-write that it comes out like the previous ellipses should be detached. So I'm going with my original phrasing XD Have fun guys!

(Also, DW, when do you get over here?)

Desert Wanderer said...

Hope there aren't any ill effects from that hard-won champagne. Lestrade, why are you up so early?! Tell us you at least went back to sleep after that. :)


Tink, I've been here since Monday, hanging out about an hour SSE of Mineral for a little bit of leave. I sign in on the 17th. We lost a couple of branches/small trees, but no one's hurt and the house is still sound.

Greg Lestrade said...

I can't help being up early. Just the way I am. I didn't get out of bed, don't worry. Dozed off again.

Danger is still asleep. when he wakes up I think a full English will be in order.

Desert Wanderer said...

Late to bed and early to rise
Makes Lestrades healthy, happy, and wise?

A full English is something that I never really got the hang of. Just a completely different breakfast than anything I'm used to. But yes, sounds like just the thing for you two. Enjoy. :)

Ria said...

Why does "full English" always sound a little bit dirty to me?

I'd love to drop by London! I've never actually been-- I've flown through Heathrow several times, but I've never had enough time to stick around and do any sightseeing. I did spend a thoroughly boring evening at the EasyHotel in the village of Heathrow, but I don't think that counts.

Greg Lestrade said...

DW - makes Lestrade's caffeine dependent, mainly. I had to stop my pleasant morning of watching Danger snuffling quietly, all tucked up in the fnug like a hibernating hedgehog, and go downstairs to liberate a double espresso from the lovely staff here.

And met a few leftover wedding guests who stayed here last night. One of whom asked where my husband was...and another who asked for my phone number. Ha. (presume he wanted it for my emergency locksmith skills.)

Greg Lestrade said...

(Mycroft, forgive me for my sins against apostrophes up there.)

Anonymous said...

I've just had to have my hand clamped over my mouth to prevent my laughing out loud and interrupting my partner on the phone with her mother. You're both ridiculous and adorable.

Bronwyn said...

Elizabeth? Hook'em horns type mascots? Because if so, you're in my hometown.
Bronwyn

X said...

The Longhorn comment made me laugh out loud, literally, which is something I do very infrequently when reading. Then the locksmith story, oh dear god, which proceeded to make me laugh hard enough that I gave myself the hiccoughs. Thanks for that.

Sounds like you two are having an absolutely fantastic time. Me, I'm the other way around this weekend, absolutely thrilled to be home and in my own bed for two days before I have to leave again for another 2 week venture out west and down to the States.

Regarding an earlier post or comment about taking the boys to Stonehenge... Be sure to keep Sherlock on a leash when you do, because I can see him quite quickly disregarding the barrier to keep people back! (When I was there, admittedly 10 years ago, it wasn't much of an obstacle should one have been truly determined...).

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