A sleepy degu that Sherlock put in my lap earlier. I think it's Argon, but I'm not sure; I had them both at one point.
Despite the title, I was asleep for a while, and I think I will be again. You get more poetry anyway though. This is from memory because I can't find it on google, which means it's probably a bit wrong (and the punctuation is all wrong). I imagine someone with more skill than I have can find the correct version.
I am a shepherd of those sheep that climb a wall by night
One by one, until I sleep, or the black pain goes white.
Because of which I cannot see a flock upon a hill
But doubts come tittering up to me that should by day be still,
And childish griefs I have outgrown into my eyes are thrust,
Till my dull tears go dropping down like lead into the dust.
Edna St Vincent Millay again.
Sounds actually rather depressing when I write it down, but it tends to cheer me up on bad nights. Which this is not one of, oddly. L and I had a good talk earlier, and...well, that's enough, really. He gives me hope.
133 comments:
Winter Night
Pile high the hickory and the light Log of chestnut struck by the blight. Welcome-in the winter night.
The day has gone in hewing and felling, Sawing and drawing wood to the dwelling For the night of talk and story-telling.
These are the hours that give the edge To the blunted axe and the bent wedge, Straighten the saw and lighten the sledge.
Here are question and reply, And the fire reflected in the thinking eye. So peace, and let the bob-cat cry.
---Edna St. Vincent Millay
Peace John,
Bronwyn
Your sleepy degu is so cute--and I hope Sherlock is getting as much comfort as he's trying to give by sharing them. It's very sweet.
I most sincerely hope that no one is awake to see this--but I found it for you, John. It's titled "Nuit Blanche," in Millay's The Harp Weaver and Other Poems. (The only thing you got wrong is it's "pane" instead of "pain".) I admire tremendously your memory for poetry.
Talk is good. Hope is good.
I'm really glad that you and Lestrade have had a good talk. Sometimes I think finding a way into those conversations is the hardest part. I'm so glad that you're there for each other; you're clearly doing a wonderful job of supporting him through this.
Also: it is far too early in the morning. Far. Too. Early.
That's a lovely poem (and an adorable degu picture). I'm glad to hear that you and Greg have had a good talk. Leaning on someone else is never easy, and I'm awed by the degree of unconditional trust, support and love you've given each other.
I hope you're both sound asleep for the rest of the night.
~A from NW
Cute degu is cute!
When I can't fall asleep is when I miss smoking the most. I used to sit on the balcony, smoke and watch the sky and backyard and so on. It was somehow calming and time just for me alone...
The degu is very cute and the poem is lovely, thoughts beautifully put.
Nameless, what were you doing up at that time? You've not joined the insomnia brigade as well, have you?
You give me hope too. And whatever I say about being scared and wanting to hide away, I know that having you with me is giving me strength and is helping. You and the boys and sleepy degus.
And I'm also in awe at your memory for poetry.
Aw, what an adorable little thing. I sort of miss having little creatures with a bit more personality around. Our Guinea Pigs were like that; the hamster is not. Luna is all instinct and no cuddle.
And it's good that you're talking. Things go awry when you don't. Husband and I are dealing with that right now, actually, and I want to tear my hair out. 16 years and you'd think we would have had this figured out by now.
Bronwyn - that's lovely, I hadn't read that one before. Thanks.
RR - that makes so much more sense than pain, I can't imagine how I got them mixed up. Well. Maybe I can, but it still makes more sense. Thanks for finding that.
L - good, I'm glad it's helping. Did the run help too? I think I feel a little clearer after that. And the poetry thing...it was just easier than hauling books around the world with me.
Yeah, run helped. Just having you and the boys with me makes it sort of feel like whatever happens, it'll be okay, in a way.
I mean, I'm sure Mrs Holmes'll get me a nice cell. East facing, extra pillow, maybe? And a cellmate with no bad habits... :)
No doubt. What, a nice...art forger, or something? I'm sure it won't come to that though.
It will be okay, no matter what.
Yeah, someone who's of the opinion that being arrested is part of the job, and doesn't hold a grudge. Art forger would be nice. We could paint a nice mural in our cell. Unicorns, maybe ;)
Oh dear... Being ridden by Roger Federer?
I was going to say you riding Roger Federicorn... but that might be a bit depressing. Maybe I'll just show him the My Little Doctor Pony, have that instead.
You'll have to have Mrs H get some extra visiting orders too, if I'm a good boy.
(Sherlock, before you read this and worry, we are just joking - I'm not planning on going to jail.)
My Little Doctor Pony
...The what? I hope you mean X's drawing and that this isn't an action figure of some sort.
Didn't you know I've been spending all my insomnia hours constructing an action figure out of matchsticks...
No, I mean X's drawing.
Although if they let me have matchsticks and humbrol paint inside, I could make a whole series. One in a white coat, for Doc Pony Hospital, one in green, for Doc Pony Jungle, one in sandy colour, for Doc Pony Desert... it'd be a huge hit. Like all the action men and Barbie ones.
Sorry, now that I know your sinister plans, I'm afraid if it all goes wrong I'll have to steal you away to Brazil. And keep you well away from matchsticks.
Not sinister.
You know where sinister comes from? Left. Sinistre in Italian. So it's you left-handers that were considered bad in the old days. Devilish, even. I still think you're rather devilish now.
If we go to Brazil I'll carve the ponies instead :)
Fiendish, then. I'd just have to distract you from your fiendish carvings.
Give me fiendish cravings instead?
We should go pick up the boy wonder, huh?
Yeah, it's that time.
Okay, I'm just too curious not to ask--did Sherlock see the above before you picked him up, and if so what sort of greeting did you get?
You poem is sitting nicely in my head today, John.
Sherlock doesn't find it funny.
Somehow I suspected he'd go all Queen Victoria about it.
Sherlock, I usually can't manage it myself, but lots of people find they feel better about things that worry or frighten them if they make jokes about it. It sort of brings the idea down in size, if it can be something to make fun of. Also laughing makes people feel better. Maybe you could pick a comedy to watch tonight--something really silly.
That's what John and Lestrade said but it's stupid because Lestrade isn't allowed to go to prison because he's a DI and that's where he sends people and not where he can go.
Sherlock, Lestrade said he's not planning on going to prison, and he said he doesn't think he's going to prison--and he wouldn't lie to you, right? Being worried about something doesn't mean thinking it's going to actually happen.
I do know what you mean. It's not my favorite thing to listen to--but I do like kowing that Lestrade and John are making each other feel better.
Sherlock - It's called dark humor. Everyone knows that they don't mean what they say, but it lets them talk about scary and serious things without it being so scary. Being able to laugh about something that you have no control over sometimes helps you feel like you're in control.
-A from NW
Adults make jokes about things Sherlock and we forget sometimes that other people might not find them funny. John and lestrade we're busy cheering each other up and it seemed to work so it can't be too bad a thing for them to do can it? :-)
Anony
Tell you what, Sherlock, you can help John make a plan for how you could all break me out and run away to Brazil. It would take lots of planning. You'd have to work out how to get me out of the prison, and then hide me, and not let anyone know that you knew anything about, and then after all that, how we could cross the border and get all the way to Brazil. It would need to be a really good plan. You can use my laptop to use Googlemaps and find out how long it would take to get all the way to brazil on a boat or something.
I still have difficulty with dark humor when I'm really worried about something, actually. It's... just not something that comes easily to me, but if the people around me are kind enough, sometimes I can get into the mood for it.
It's sort of like Martin being offended when Douglas and Carolyn laughed at his emergency procedures-- just hearing them laugh about it made him very unhappy, but when he talked to Douglas later, he started to see the whole situation as funny and even joined in a bit.
Speaking of flying, have you all actually seen "Those Magnificent Men In Their Flying Machines" yet? If you haven't, it might be the right kind of funny for a time like this. I haven't seen it myself (it's less well known in America), but I plan to.
You might want to add that his mother cannot be involved in this mission. Though I have to ask.....why Brazil?
-A from NW
Ha, yeah, the Fairy Holmesmother would be cheating!
You'd have to ask John why Brazil...maybe he's always fancied a Brazilian...so to speak.
I just like the sound of it, and the jungle has all those bugs for Sherlock to discover.
(Should I be worried how good John is at planning prison breaks? We'd better never let his plan get out - they'll be breaking free as fast as I can put them away!)
I'm not the one currently looking up freighters to stow away on...
...I suppose I have a slight advantage of knowing how a lot of the detection systems for stowaways work.
I think I can work a way around the CO2 probes...
You can get Mycroft to help.
I'm not the one currently looking up freighters to stow away on...
Okay, that did make me laugh.
I'm still impressed by Sherlock's plan for getting me out of prison (which no, I'm not sharing on a public blog!), given it doesn't involve knotted sheets hanging out of a cell window, or baking a cake with a file inside (about as far as my plans for that bit had got.)
He probably doesn't know the classics, so he comes to it with a fresh mind. As he does so many things.
If we baked a cake we'd have to get Mycroft and Mrs Hudson to help because John doesn't really bake cakes like you do and it might not work anyway my plan is much better.
which no, I'm not sharing on a public blog!
The prison authorities of the world thank you.
Sherlock, I am absolutely positive your plan is much better than baking a file in a cake. It takes forever to file through things.
Yes, very important to base escape plans around John's culinary skills, yes. Although I don't think Mrs Hudson would mind helping. She seems like the type who'd enjoy a good caper.
Maybe she could bake an angle grinder into a cake.
*looks up "angle grinder"*
That would be a big cake.
And a heavy one.
Might be a bit noisy. A file really wouldn't take that long.
I see Sherlock has put 'degu food' on the list for things he'd take... they'd need a travel cage, though. I can almost fit in their usual cage.
They can travel stowed away in your hair.
(Or his hoodie pouch.)
Yeah, cos I'll be growing my hair and beard out, in disguise, right...
Uh oh, potential moustache alert...
For you or me??
You! I've been forbidden from growing facial hair, if you remember. I'll just have to dye it green or something.
I'd go for a full beard. Not that far off now, and I've only given up shaving for two or three days.
I dunno John, if you're in Brazil and looking for inadvisable hair-styling options you could always go local...
Nameless - ouch! Here I am, reading peacefully and suddenly this! It's unfair to spring something like that on people peacefully resting after a workout in the local gym! XD
Whatever. I am going to shower. And take my safety razor with me. No wax for me! :-)
*spit take*
Nameless, you owe me a keyboard!!!
Nameless - that's not hair I want to style!
And you all ignore it when I suggested that earlier... guess I should be less subtle.
*goes looking for missed suggestion*
Aha. Okay, yes, less subtlety. That went right by me. *clueless*
L - just trying not to encourage you... Also I had to look up what it meant.
*beams and takes a bow*
Lestrade - what can I say? I thought your version was far less subtle than mine :-p
All of your comments went over my head and that's okay. =) I...don't think I need to know.
~A from NW
OW, Nameless, sheesh! :D
L, I thought you were talking about some capoeira fighter or something :)
Danger, if it's any help, I really really would prefer it if you didn't go native that way.
Nothing against your incredibly lovely..er...gentleman's vegetables. But I find it totally weird when blokes go for that look.'Plucked chicken' comes to mind...
Nameless - I think they're all just too determined to see the best in me. (Or too sweet and innocent to think the way you and I do. I mean, DW was noticeably absent...)
Sweet and innocent, that's me. Or innocent, anyway. *bats eyelashes*
Ha. You have nothing to worry about. Don't think I've seen that in person, and I'd prefer to keep it that way.
I thought I'd misunderstood you L so let it pass but apparently it wasn't my mind playing tricks ;-)
Anony
It's...awkward.
I mean, when someone gets naked in front of you and you stare...they're hoping it's because you like what you see. And takes some quick recovery to stop it all ending badly.
Also, if they're the type to shave...5 o'clock shadow down there isn't that nice.
Anyway, it makes me incredibly happy to feel like you're thoroughly the right side of puberty, complete with all body hair that's natural for you, basically.
Thank goodness for that.
5 o'clock shadow down
...No, that doesn't sound nice at all.
gentleman's vegetables... 'Plucked chicken'
You do know how to make something sound unattractive, don't you?
But let's face it, genitalia - whether male or female - aren't generally made for looking at, are they? It's function rather than form that counts :-)
Interesting question there Nameless - so I'm not supposed to be looking at the meat and two veg then?
Nameless - it's a gift, yeah. And true. I just find that messing with nature - generally speaking - doesn't make it any more attractive. But that is rather a blanket statement.
I can certainly say that I have enough trouble shaving my face after a long day...I wouldn't put a razor anywhere near rather more delicate parts of me! Ouch!
SH - I did wonder if she'd done that on purpose...
SH - Sorry, I forgot to reply to your comment this morning. No, not insomnia (although I got a rubbish nights' sleep, as per usual when I have to get up stupidly early), I just had a painfully early start to the working day.
I just think that, in general, genitals aren't particularly visually attractive. There are always exceptions, I suppose, but really, in deciding whether to return for a repeat performance, whether they're gorgeous or ugly isn't likely to be a factor.
Lestrade - Says the man with pierced nipples :-p How are they, BTW? If that's not too personal a question.
And they were your words! I just quoted them...
Yeah, that is very true. Already thought John was gorgeous in mind and body before I saw him naked :)
The nipples are fine - very good, actually. Don't hurt at all. But I'm still way too nervous to try changing the jewellery. Don't think I'll do that until a few months past when they say they should be healed enough.
(And thank goodness for that, or I would've been in trouble...)
What are you going to get?
What do you think I should get? I'm getting some of those see through plastic ones, for...when I need to be subtle.
I don't know if I want rings, or circular barbells or something. I mean, I'm pretty happy with what I've got :)
In defense of shaved vegetables and whatever else you want to call it I shall remind the company of one simple fact: hair in between the teeth (or stuck in your throat and tickling) is a very fail-proof method to kill the mood. It's the violent plucking that makes me want to cross my legs and curl into a little ball...
Rings could be nice.
CR - I've never had a problem beyond the err...hopefully subtle removal of hair from end of tongue :)
Danger - I was thinking maybe circular barbells, rather than rings. I've no idea if my theory is sound, but I like the thought of then not being so easy to catch anything on...
http://www.thebodyjewellerystore.co.uk/images/products/circular-barbell-316l--2mm-12ga1233.jpg
like those.
Those look pretty good too.
You should choose - I'm not the one who's going to be looking at them. I'm in it purely for the...sensation.
Nameless, I'm glad you're not suffering from insomnia, I was beginning to think I was the only person who slept round here! And yeah, I sleep badly if I've got to get up early, probably because I'm terrified I'll oversleep.
L - you could use your next poll to decide what ornament you should have for your piercings. You know how helpful we are. Or maybe not, we'd probably suggest rings with unicorns or something similar.
You should get what you want! I'm sure you'll be extremely decorative either way.
L - lucky you! :-)
we'd probably suggest rings with unicorns or something similar.
...I don't want to admit to what exactly I've just Googled. Suffice to say John is about to have some sort of asthma attack he's laughing so hard...
There seems to be a great fashion for connecting pierced nipples to...a ring which fits around another part of the male anatomy. And within the same Google image result is a unicorn, trussed up, with chains between nipples, and..well, both horns, you could say. I'm alarmed, quite frankly!
(And now I really think I have to put John in the recovery position before I lose him.)
I laughed so hard at this that the cat got up and left.
That is...truly amazing. I can honestly say I've never seen anything like it before in my life.
No link?!?!
With your love of unicorns I find that hard to believe...
A link...well, I suppose this is John's blog, not mine...let me go and find one...
Oh no...
Ha! I couldn't - I mean, you were okay, I was here to save you. I couldn't inflict that picture on the wider audience - some of them, by their own admission, innocent.
Anyway Mrs H would have me put in a cell with a couple of really angry murderers who I personally got sent down.
I'm sure they can find it themselves if they really want to.
I'm sure they could.
And then very swiftly realise that they didn't actually want to.
So, changing the subject. You feeling okay about your test tomorrow? Not going to forget what colour cat's eyes signify a slip road, or a hard shoulder, and start writing down the arterial system of the human body?
*sugh*
Fine, I'll just have to try to find it myself. Heaven knows what I'll stumble across meanwhile...
Which pitiful attempt at a guilt trip reminds me of a joke... How many Jewish grandmothers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Once I delete that picture from my brain, I'm sure I'll have ample room for everything I need to know for tomorrow...
Good luck with your test John, Hope you get some good sleep in preparation.
Anony
RR - anything you stumble across will be a gentle introduction.
And I've no idea.
Danger - Yeah...I'm fairly sure that won't be the answer to any questions. Unless the Highway Code has really changed since I last looked at it...
How many Jewish grandmothers does it take to change a lightbulb?
"No, no, leave it be. I LIKE sitting here in the dark all alone."
(I think I found it. I'm afraid all it got from me was a mental Spock eyebrow. Hopeless, I'm just hopeless.)
Best of luck on your test, John!
Hopeless? I don't think there's one prescribed reaction to something like that. Raised eyebrow is allowed.
So...want a lift between work and the test tomorrow, Danger? I could hang around and when youre done we could go somewhere? I mean, just a ride out somewhere?
Heh. Thanks.
John - Good luck on your test tomorrow! I'm sure you'll do fine. It's never the driver that's the problem; it's always everyone else on the road(and that rubbish bin...)
Greg - *arches eyebrow* I don't want to know about the unicorn. If it's scaring you, there's no hope for me. :P
...I probably shouldn't mention that I'm chopping carrots and cucumbers for dinner, should I?
*giggling*
~A from NW
I mean, just a ride out somewhere
Yeah, that'd be good.
And thanks everyone, for the good wishes. I think it'll go okay.
lestrade - oh dear lord, I think I just found that picture. And other... delights. Including a few of that chap in the pink bumless chaps, hoofmittens and unicorn horn. He's got a tail, you know 0_0
Good luck John, both with recovering from seeing that picture, and with the test tomorrow :-)
Of course it'll go okay! You've already got your car licence - you can't possibly fail your theory test! I don't know anyone who ever has.
Practical test, that's different. But theory? I'd have to....pretend I didn't know you, or something :)
Nameless - I have seen that particular fellow before... (And would like to point out there's nothing wrong with having a tail. Well, owning one...)
(Great, and now you all go silent on me? On that endnote?)
(Not you, John. You should be asleep.)
I didn't see Nameless's picture, or that particular fellow, or any fellow at all!
I do seem to recall something about a tail, though.., *ponders*
*giggling* We're just waiting for certain readers of this blog to speak up.
So, is John still alive over there, or has he collapsed from laughing so hard? =)
~A from NW
By the way and while we're in the neighborhood--don't you have more questions to answer, O sexpert?
He's doing a fair approximation of being asleep. It is quarter to one, and he's got work in the morning...
RR - yeah, I have. Wouldn't call myself a sexpert though. Just happy to offer any advice I have... for what it's worth.
Call it what you want, I have to say I've been finding your answers very interesting and enlightening (and I mean that without any sarcasm at all).
Well... thanks.
Will do more in the morning, when John's working.
Oh, I didn't mean you had to this minute, I just thought you were looking for something to do. And I genuinely think you've been giving really good answers.
Although after a five mile run, all the painting, and planning an escape to Brazil, I've no idea how you're at all coherent right now...
Good luck with the test this morning Doc.
Clearly I am putting the wrong words into google as I can't find this amazing piece of kit.
Lestrade - I like the way you make the distinction between "having" and "owning" a tail. Oddly enough, a picture or two of such tails came up in the search as well. I was not searching for tails. Of any description.
I'm starting to wonder now whether Lestrade and I are the only people who have SafeSearch turned off by default...
On a sombre note: PC David Rathband was found dead in his home last night (he was the police officer shot and blinded by Raoul Moat in 2010). The The Police Superintendents’ Association of England and Wales noted (correctly imho)that he was "killed in the line of duty". A reminder of the dangers our police officers face as they work on our behalf.
SH - nipple+rings+unicorn - and you have to switch off the filter of results...
nameless, my SafeSearch is turned off as well :-)
John, good luck :-)
Nameless - I had no idea. Christ. It really is shocking that anyone - police officer or not - can suddenly find themselves attacked like that. My heart goes out to his friends and family.
SH - count it as a blessing. It's not an image you need in your head.
So how's it going this morning, L? I think you said John is at the surgery today, so are you finishing up the painting?
Yeah, he is and yes, painting. just done the second coat of the blue.
Woodwork to go.
I always rather enjoyed painting trim. For edges do you use masking tape, a piece of cardboard, or trust you eye and hand?
Eye and hand. Paint's too fresh to take masking tape even if I wanted to.
Point. I never trusted my eye and hand, but I never painted anywhere that didn't have so many layers of paint on alr already as to make it possible to find a clean edge on the woodwork, so I mostly went with that anyway--except on the windows.
(Please mentally delet the extra "alr"--dunno how it got in there!)
If this had too much paint on it I'd have stripped it back.
Sitting in the sun, waiting for John to finish surgery. He's over running. Lots of sick people today I guess. Or everyone's heard he's back and are coming to see him.
That's because you want to do it right, and I just wanted it done.
Oh, I bet the second. :)
Good luck on your test, John! And have a good ride after, both of you.
I know it doesn't always feel like it, but people do appreciate - and are grateful for - the work you all do for us, especially with the dangers you face while doing it.
He's in there now... him and twenty odd 17 year olds! He looked like their teacher or something, out on a field trip...
Yeah, the ones who don't appreciate it are just rather more vocal and in your face about it :)
Thanks, though. It's nice to be reminded by all of you lot that most people are decent and appreciative.
Mostly we forget to say so, though. Thanks for the reminder, Nameless.
Heh!
I can't imagine it can take long.
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