Monday, July 18, 2011

a man in uniform

We stayed over at L's last night, since Mrs Hudson was...actually quite insistant that she'd be happy to get the boys off to school this morning on her own. Well, almost on her own. Apparently at one point, Sherlock scaled the bookcase in the living room and refused to come down until Anthea came upstairs and gave him a stern looking at. Words are usually unnecessary for her.

Point being, I slept in. Until nearly ten. It was amazing. Well, I got up to see L off and fail to make him lunch because we'd eaten everything we brought over with us and there was no food. But I went back to bed after. And slept. Sleep is a marvellous invention.

Got up, drank coffee, went in search of clean sheets so I could change the bed...and found L's uniform instead. Sort of wadded up at the back of the top shelf. When spread out on the bed, it looked quite nice, apart from the wrinkles and the one small moth that appeared to be living under the collar. So I dropped it off at the cleaners' on the way home. I mean, he might need it, right? You never know.

174 comments:

Greg Lestrade said...

Ummm...thanks, I guess. You know, technically, you shouldn't be wandering the streets with my uniform...but I trust you not to impersonal a police officer (it would get you nothing but grief, anyway).

Pretty certain I won't need it though. Unless you know something I don't.

Glad you got some sleep. I didn't want to wake you - or get up - this morning.

Greg Lestrade said...

Impersonate. Not impersonal.

John H. D. Watson said...

Just trying to help! You know me. Anyway it didn't deserve that sort of treatment, not that I can talk, with both of mine in a box.

I didn't want you to get up either, but that's life. If we never had to get up in the mornings, lie ins wouldn't be so nice.

Tink said...

Maybe you should get your uniform cleaned too John! Then you could hang them in the closet next to each other.

And who knows. Maybe an officer and a gentleman might need to have a night in >_>

John H. D. Watson said...

Heh. I think he'd rather see me in scrubs, for reasons I can't quite fathom.

Greg Lestrade said...

Yeah, you've sneaked a peek at mine, now you've got to show me yours...preferably on.

If you want to, that is. I understand if you don't.

Lie ins will be a distant memory soon - Doesn't Sherlock finish school for the summer on Friday? We'll be woken by Sherlock alarm every day then, to entertain him.

Greg Lestrade said...

How is it hard to fathom? Scrubs - thin layer of material, loose fitting, easy...access.

Uniform - 8 million buttons, belts, clasps, zips etc. Impossible to get into.

Need I say more?

John H. D. Watson said...

Ha, of course. They're more comfortable too.

now you've got to show me yours...preferably on.

If you like.

Yeah, but if he's with us all day, we'll have more opportunity to wear him out! It has to be possible, right?

Greg Lestrade said...

What d'you mean 'us'? You, treacle, You. I shall be busy thwarting criminals. It's easier than tiring out a 5 yr old.

When's Mycroft's day at big school?

John H. D. Watson said...

Not while we're camping! You can do you full share of tiring out. (Treacle? That's a new one.)

Harrow is the 25th (mon after Sherlock's last day of school) and his mum still wants him to visit Eton so that's the 27th.

Greg Lestrade said...

Right. Does he want me to book those two days off?

And yes, during camping I shall of course be there for tiring out purposes.

Is it? What should I use...darling? Dearest? Snugglebum? Honeypie? Shnookums?

John H. D. Watson said...

Not objecting, merely commenting. As long as it's not 'marmite' I don't mind.

Yes, although he's having another round of resistance to the idea of visiting Eton and says you shouldn't both with that one. I think we'll probably end up going though.

Tink said...

Greg: Being from a part of the country that uses endearments for complete strangers, I could possibly give you a few ideas if you'd like!

John: When are you looking at going camping again? I'm going for two weeks in about two weeks. My brother is coming with me, so this should be awesome. We've worked out a signal system for 'Tent Is In Use' already, just in case.

How's Mycroft handling everything? Good luck with Sherlock!

Greg Lestrade said...

Bloody hell. Look how late it is. Sorry, on way home. Didn't mean to work laye

John H. D. Watson said...

Tink - mid August. L has the exact dates because he had to get them off from work. I'm so pleased everything's working out for you and your brother. I hope you have a marvellous time.

L - it's all right, you'll be home just in time for dinner.

Greg Lestrade said...

hang on...some readers may have missed this...there is dinner waiting for me?? Made by you? I'm stunned. in a good way.

(and yes, I am home, but I feel this should be celebrated in front of everyone)

John H. D. Watson said...

In the interests of honesty, I feel I should say that Mycroft helped me.

Greg Lestrade said...

And what is it, Sugar-Pie? Do tell everyone.

(Well done Mycroft - looks/smells/tastes amazing)

John H. D. Watson said...

You're being ridiculous. It's just this chicken thing, with rice that has nuts and bits of dried fruit in.

Greg Lestrade said...

I require ridiculousness. Work was far too serious.

On the bright side, the way senior officers are leaving the Met, I could be Commissioner by next week.

John H. D. Watson said...

I'm not sure that's the bright side. It'd be all paperwork all the time, wouldn't it? I don't think they let the commissioner go out to harass drug dealers.

Well. I am glad you like it.

Greg Lestrade said...

You're right, it would be horrible. I'm fairly sure I don't even want to make DCI, if I'm honest. I mean, maybe, in the last few years.

DI is far enough from the action already, really.

I dunno, people say that shows lack of ambition. But it's just not what I signed up to do.

Becca said...

Oooh, sounds delicious. I love chicken with raisins and other dried fruit.

I forget which of you doesn't like spicy food, but if this is a hit, you might like Biryani.

John H. D. Watson said...

That's not lack of ambition, that's just...yeah, doing your job. If you'd wanted to stare at reports all day, you could've been a banker.

Greg Lestrade said...

John likes anything that's hot enough to damage your health, Becca.

Danger - yeah, but the ones who want you to go for promotions are the ones who are up there already, so they don't understand that.

Becca said...

Well, I don't know, spicy food can be good for the health. :)

I can't take most effective decongestants, but spicy food will clear my sinuses out crazy well.

On ambition - maybe it's not ambitious, but what's wrong with not being ambitious? What's wrong with liking what you do now? I've never understood the cultural praise for ambition. If everyone wanted to rise to the top, there'd be a lot of unhappy people.

John H. D. Watson said...

but the ones who want you to go for promotions are the ones who are up there already

Yeah. Almost no one higher up understood why I signed up for another tour in Afghanistan when I could've gone home, or...whatever they were offering me, I forget.

Becca - don't listen to Lestrade, most of the things I eat aren't even properly spicy, just a bit warm. Not, as he puts it, mouth searing. (Not that there aren't some of those too, but...)

On ambition, I think it just depends what your ambition is. It shouldn't necessarily mean the ambition to climb the ranks, though most people do seem to look at it that way.

Tink said...

Greg: It is quite ambitious to want to stay DI in the face of possible promotions. It takes effort! My father was the same way. He wanted to *do* stuff instead of manage people and write reports. He managed to retire before they could manage to promote him!

John: Oooh, late August should be quite lovely for camping. It'll be great for the four of you, especially with Mycroft heading off to school.

Speaking of which.

Mycroft: Have you gotten your motorcycle gear yet? Because you are going to be the coolest man on campus walking around in your leathers as you wait for Greg to pick you up whenever you all feel like it!

Also, because I am curious.

Sherlock: How's the mummification ritual coming along?

Greg Lestrade said...

Becca - spicy food can clear the brains out of my head.

And Mycroft doesn't have any bike gear yet, because I'm a totally crap .... whatever I am to him. And every time we think about it I drive a car up a wall, get sent away, that sort of thing.

And my ambition is just to...I dunno, stop murderers killing people, whenever I can? And catch them when I can't.

Sherlock said...

It's going okay except we had to make some stuff up, like chants and things, because they aren't written down anywhere and really Herodotus was just guessing anyway, but we're almost done, we're just painting the sarcophagus. It's fish shaped.

Mycroft said...

I hope to get it soon, perhaps when Sherlock's out of school, but I am never going to be cool.

Greg Lestrade said...

I really will try harder, Mycroft. I'm sorry.

But let me assure you, very few people look 'cool' in bike gear. I mean, when you're on the bike it's okay, wearing leathers, but when you get off it's all great big knobbly-looking knees, from the sliders, a baggy arse where you've stretched out the panels tucking up on the bike, skinny legs and a huge helmet-head.

We'll just get you some nice regular gear, which won't look out of place off the bike, as well as giving you loads of protection on it.

Remember, one person's 'cool' is another's 'dickhead'.

Mycroft said...

It's not your fault. You shouldn't blame yourself for things that weren't under your control.

Yes, normal looking things were be better, thank you.

Remember, one person's 'cool' is another's 'dickhead'.

I hadn't thought about it quite like that before. Perhaps you're right.

Anonymous said...

Sherlock, as for the chants, they usually chanted from the Book of the Dead. It's a really long book, because it was basically going over all the stuff the person had done in life. I think you're better off making up your own chants.

The sarcophagus sounds very neat! Will you draw us a picture of it when it's done?

Greg Lestrade said...

You shouldn't blame yourself for things that weren't under your control.

Hey, it's what I do best. Don't take it away from me.

Perhaps I should have said 'is another's 'uncool''...I don't want your Mum ripping me head off for the language on these blogs.

It is true, though. Really.

Sherlock said...

Mrs T said no one knew how to say them! Next time I'm asking you first. You should come and talk to our class if you come to England. Yes I can draw a picture of it, it's going to have Isis on it I think.

Anonymous said...

Well, saying them is a bit different. People can read them and understand what was said, but because the language hadn't been actually spoken for so long, some of the pronunciations are just guesses.

But we do know what was said, or at least large parts of it. Some of it we are still trying to figure out, but that's the fun part!

Greg Lestrade said...

Does this mean we're in for Sherlock and Mycroft conspiring against us in ancient Egyptian soon?

Sherlock said...

Oh. Okay. Are they translated somewhere I could read them? Making our own up was pretty fun. John says I have to go to bed now, good night.

John H. D. Watson said...

It wouldn't surprise me.

Greg Lestrade said...

Well, I'm sure it's dead easy to learn. No sweat.

(They only like things that are challenging, right?)

Mycroft said...

Perhaps I should have said 'is another's 'uncool''

Uncool and dickhead aren't synonyms though. She can't fault you for being precise in your meaning.

Greg Lestrade said...

Right. Yeah. You tell her that.

Mycroft said...

I will.

Anon Without A Name said...

And my ambition is just to...I dunno, stop murderers killing people, whenever I can? And catch them when I can't.

Pretty impressive ambition, if you ask me (which, I know, you didn't). And better yet, one you are achieving.

I'm not going to comment on the idea of you in your uniform, or John in his, or even John in scrubs. I'm just going to... take a moment :-p

Greg Lestrade said...

I'm going to have to drag my old body off to bed.

Some of didn't get a lie in... and I'm about to fall asleep on the sofa.

Danger's fault, for wearing me out last night.

John H. D. Watson said...

Bed sounds pretty good despite my lie in.

Greg Lestrade said...

Ah, you're a smooth-talker, Snuggle-puff.

John H. D. Watson said...

Learned it all from you, I'm sure.

Greg Lestrade said...

Ha! Not a chance.

Anonymous said...

I know you've gone to bed, Sherlock, but when you wake up you can check out this Book of the Dead. http://www.sacred-texts.com/egy/ebod/

That may be a bit boring, though, so if you would like an actual book, this one may be more interesting. http://www.amazon.com/Journey-Through-Afterlife-Ancient-Egyptian/dp/0674057503/ref=sr_1_9?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1311025137&sr=1-9

I hope you enjoy!

Amy said...

And here's a short video about the Book of the Dead: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-11669904

I used to have a book called 'Understanding Hieroglyphs', but I think I lent it to someone... I love learning about writing systems that are very different to ours. :)

Good night all!

Lindsay said...

John- You are a very bad man, John Watson. *grin*

Lestrade- I know exactly what you mean re ambition. I feel the same way about supervisory positions...why would I want to be responsible for bullying around a bunch of junior attorneys when I can go to court and try cases instead? Not that I'm anywhere long in the tooth enough for a supervisory position right now. Heh.

Sherlock- One of the interesting things about Egyptian writing, to my understanding, is that it doesn't use vowels. The spoken language had them, of course, but the hieroglyphics mostly stand for consonant sounds, so we have no real way of knowing which vowels went in there when you said things aloud. There is a kind of consensus sometimes, but this is one reason why you often see names spelled different ways.

For example, the god Amun (for whom Tutankhamun was named) is sometimes written as Amon, Amen, or Ammon.

Tink said...

I have a small crisis with ants and then a nap afterwards and I miss everything! Hope you guys all slept well by the time you read this.

Mycroft: You *are* cool. You have a dry sense of humour, you love deeply (if quietly), have a growing sense of knowing who you are (which is light-years beyond where your peers are) or at least who you'd like to be, and you speak *how* many languages again? I think you're pretty darn cool for all that and a whole lot more.

Sherlock: Have fun with all your new knowledge of The Book of the Dead! I think a fish shaped sarcophagus will be awesome!

Greg: Don't beat yourself up. I know you guys don't put every moment in your days here, so I didn't know. You're a good Whatever You Are to Mycroft, don't think any different. (Yes, I know you are Made of Fret, but we still love you!)

John: You and Greg are so awesome together. Your rough edges fit together like puzzle pieces.

Greg Lestrade said...

Lindsay - he is a very bad man! It's 6 am and I'm still in bed. He's a terrible influence

John H. D. Watson said...

I'm an excellent influence! Bed is where everyone should be at 6am.

annoyedwabbit said...

Mycroft - I've been thinking about you and Lestrade's "one person's cool is another person's dickhead" comment all afternoon. See, my younger brother was bullied pretty badly in elementary and middle school for being uncompromisingly weird. In some ways I think he's a little like you - very intelligent, and not interested in playing dumb, as well as multi-lingual - but he's also just plain weird. I say this with deep love and affection, but it's true. Anyway, he as bullied. Some of the girls in his class used to get paper towels to wipe down their desks if he touched them, people called him and his two equally odd friends gay (they looked this up in the dictionary, found the definition meaning cheerful or brightly colored, and rebelled by taking it as a compliment,) occasionally got pushed around, and once even had a classmate threaten to bring a screwdriver to school to stab him. At that point, since the school administration had repeatedly demonstrated their COMPLETE USELESSNESS in doing anything to stop the bullying, my father gave up, called the police on the kid threatening screwdrivers, enrolled my siblings in Judo, and politely informed the school that he had told my brother to fight back if he was bullied again.

My brother, who is one of the sweetest people I know, still has self-esteem issues from being bullied, and finds it hard to make friends. However, both he and I (and I was also something of a social outcast, for many of the same reasons) found that things got a lot better when we got to high school, which starts at about age 14 over here. There were more people, for one, and they were starting to develop A)minds of their own, and B)spines. At our high school, the social outsiders found their kindred souls, banded together, and collectively ignored the popular kids. My brother found people who accepted him for his weirdness - especially when he joined the cross country team, which, at our high school, was always full of crazy intellectuals. Now he's going to college at Stanford, and really enjoying it. He has found other people who take equal joy in learning how to say "don't worry, I also hate the Soviets" in Polish, or discussing physics in the middle of the night for no other reason than because it's interesting.

The moral of this ridiculously long comment: I completely understand your dread of returning to school. I have been there, and my brother has been there, and for both of us, it got better once people grew up a little. I really hope your experience is something like my brother's and mine, and you find other unusual people to hang out with.

Rider said...

Bed is where everyone should be at 6am

shouldn't that be "6am ..."?
'

Tink said...

Wabbit: I about fell over giggling when I read about learning to say "don't worry, I also hate the Soviets!" For us it was "Don't kill me! I am Canadian and I know state secrets!" in Greek, German, and French. (Not that I remember now of course... but it was fun at the time!)

John: Good job! :D
Greg: Good job! :D

You two can decide what I'm congratulating you on! <3

Greg Lestrade said...

There was no time for ... Or etc.! No matter how persuasive Danger is, the Met still require me at work at 7, and I prefer to be there in time to see the night shift. So 6 is about the latest I'll ever be getting up on a work day.

AnnoyedWabbit - we're hoping that visiting the school and presumably meeting some of the other boys who will be attending in Mycroft's year might begin to put his mind at ease. I mean, he should be able to find people he has things in common with far more easily at Harrow than he did at his last school. And it is a very good school, with excellent pastoral care.

John H. D. Watson said...

Did Sherlock raise the idea that seven is a barbaric time to require you to come into work in his chat with your super?

Anon Without A Name said...

Bed is where everyone should be at 6am.

Very wise. *nods*

Lestrade - you have to be at work for 7am? I think I might have to agree with Sherlock on this one.

Greg Lestrade said...

12 hour shifts, 7 til 7 is how we work. I prefer it to the earliest, lates and nights personally.

Anonymous said...

I'd blame you for making me make muffins, John... but I'd already sort of planned to anyway.

Greg Lestrade said...

That should of course be earlies, lates and nights.

Danger, think I'm in court all day tomorrow. Joy.

Will try and get out early today. Might bring some work home.

John H. D. Watson said...

Wait, muffins? Why are the... Oh I put a poll up last night didn't i? Right. Could've been cupcakes instead.

L - that'll be nice. I'll try to keep Sherlock from jumping you for crime scene photos when you come in the door.

Tink said...

Mmmm. Muffins! Now I want to bake too, but if I mention this aloud at work I shall be pestered until I give in to making an extra what ever I make to bring in to work.

So you get to be the recipient of my happy 'I want to bake' smile-y thoughts instead! (Also yay for Greg coming home early!)

-Tink

Greg Lestrade said...

Tell him all he'll get from me are incredibly tedious risk assessments and budget forms, so not to get excited.

Any particular dinner requests?

John H. D. Watson said...

That linguini with...stuff? You know, you made it a few weeks ago on one of those days the boys ended up covered in mud and...I can't remember what was in it but it was really good?

This is not the most helpful answer ever, is it?

Greg Lestrade said...

Linguini con stuff, right. I'll grab some bits on the way home.

Hope it stops pissing down, too, or I shall get very wet.

John H. D. Watson said...

Thanks. :)

I hope so too, but it looks...wet out there.

Greg Lestrade said...

No worries.

Done anything nice today? Before the torrential downpours. Hope you didn't get caught in any of them.

Greg Lestrade said...

Am leaving work! If you or the boys want anything speak before I leave the supermarket...

John H. D. Watson said...

No, we're fine! Sorry, the dogs got out, and then Sherlock got out after them, and...yeah. It was a bit confused there for a while.

John H. D. Watson said...

So in answer to your question, at the time I had not been caught in any downpours, but I certainly have now! It was a bit fun though.

Greg Lestrade said...

And at some point Sherlock lifted your phone...got it back yet? I assume dogs and boys all now found?

John H. D. Watson said...

Oh no, what's he done? Has he been texting you?

Yes, everyone back home and vigorously toweling themselves off. Or toweling dogs off, depending.

Greg Lestrade said...

Called me. Did a passable impression of you, except about an octave too high. Even called me 'love'. And when I told him I knew it was him, he said you'd asked him to call, and you couldn't come to the phone because you were having a poo.

Anyway, apparently you wanted a kilo of chocolate chips, six big prawns with the heads and tails and eyes and everything still on, some kidneys - and it didn't matter what animal they were out of and some mango juice.

Anyway, tell him I bought him a prawn, but it's not to leave the kitchen. I am not tracking down dissected putrid prawns in his room.

John H. D. Watson said...

Ha! Everything on that list sounds almost plausible except the kidneys. Right, I'll have a talk with him. Again. At least it wasn't him who let the dogs out this time.

Greg Lestrade said...

Who was the culprit? And did they get far? Should I check for traffic chaos on the police radio?

John H. D. Watson said...

It was Mrs Hudson's friend, you know, he runs the shop on the corner. He was not expecting to be greeted by hounds. They can be startling.

Greg Lestrade said...

Right, just locking bike up. Make sure the dogs don't have s taste for freedom now and make a break for it when I try to get in, weighed down with paperwork and everything for ham, lemon, courgette and basil linguine. Or, as it shall now be known, 'linguini con stuff'.

John H. D. Watson said...

That's the stuff! You must be psychic.

Greg Lestrade said...

Nah, you just gave a good description.

Got to do paperwork when this is cooked/eaten. Have we got any beer?

John H. D. Watson said...

Not a lot, but a couple of bottles at least, yeah.

Greg Lestrade said...

Don't need a lot. Just enough to dull the pain of reading the budgets stuff. Allow me to find a way of still catching murderers with even less money next year.

John H. D. Watson said...

Fun. Oh and I got your uniform back, it's in the closet, but I can take it back to yours tomorrow if you like. 'Course I'd be wandering the streets with it again...

Greg Lestrade said...

Could leave it here. I don't mind.

If you tried to use it to impersonate a police officer you'd be found out by the turn ups on the trousers, the rolled back sleeves, general air of it being too big for you, and lack of shoulder numbers/rank badges etc. (which I'm assuming you removed and stored somewhere...)

John H. D. Watson said...

Oh hush, you're not that much taller than I am! Yeah, all the bits are in a plastic bag on the dresser.

Greg Lestrade said...

Hah, I know.

But you're cute when you get indignant.

:D

And you're the perfect height for me to kiss all those frown lines on your forehead when you scowl at me like that.

Becca said...

Should Sherlock know where all the pieces are?

PS: Is turn up British for cuffs? When I have to roll up the hem of pants (I don't know about John, but I _am_ short) it's called cuffs.

John H. D. Watson said...

Bastard. Give me a real kiss.

Greg Lestrade said...

Becca - yes. Turn ups on trousers, cuffs on sleeves.

Danger - so rude and demanding! Remember I can arrest you for swearing at me.

Come in the kitchen, you can have a kiss

John H. D. Watson said...

All right, you're forgiven. Do you want me to do anything? Set the table?

Greg Lestrade said...

Becca - I also assume JHDW means the numbers/pips etc. are at my flat, not within Sherlock's reach.

Danger - yeah, you could set the table. Round up the boys. Give me another kiss before Sherlock arrives to make 'eeeuuuggghhhhh' noises...

John H. D. Watson said...

I'll do the last thing on that list first I think.

I also assume JHDW means the numbers/pips etc. are at my flat, not within Sherlock's reach.

I...may not have exactly meant that. But I've moved them now, thanks, Becca.

Greg Lestrade said...

Well, rightfully Sherlock shouldn't be able to move now he's eaten that much linguine.

Is my hat at my place? or here too?

John H. D. Watson said...

I assume at yours, though I saw no sign of it.

Thanks for the linguini con stuff, it was delicious.

Greg Lestrade said...

Prego, Pericolo.

Hmm. I should try and find it. Not that I'll need it. Been years since I wore that uniform. Might be too fat for it now.

John H. D. Watson said...

Did you just call me Danger in Italian (or perhaps, as this online dictionary suggest, Hazard)? Ha. Better than sugarpie.

Doubt it, you look extremely fit to me. Feel free to try it though.

Liz said...

Hello, another lurker here, but having just put my answer to Lestrade's poll as tea I thought I would pop over here to check on yours John. However, it did make me wonder if really a muffin can be considered a cupcake that got out of control? This may just be me, but I always pretend my cupcakes are muffins if one or two of them decide to explode upwards in the oven. Anyone else? No, probably just me... however it does keep my work collegues happy when I bring them in.
On another note, John, I'm short too (although I am a girl) and alos the shortest in my family. My younger brother is over a foot taller than me, but it was always fun to put his size 13 shoes on and pretend to be a clown!

Have a nice evening, you are making me want italian food tomorrow now!

Liz -x-x-x-

PS sorry for the massive post as my first comment, I got excited!!

Greg Lestrade said...

I did! I said 'You're welcome, Danger'.

I wish my Nonna was still alive. She'd love you and the boys.

You've made me worry about my hat. I seriously can't ask for another replacement bit of a uniform I don't even wear...

tortadizucchero.

John H. D. Watson said...

L - Another? What happened to the first one?

I wish she was too. I'd love to have met her, and I'm really excited to meet the rest of your family there. They sound like lovely people.

torta di... That's sugarpie in Italian. Isn't it.

Liz - my sister is taller than I am, which is annoying and bloody unfair.

The cupcake-muffin divide does seem rather thin, especially once one starts adding chocolate to the muffins. I'm sure your co-workers appreciate them no matter what you call them though.

Greg Lestrade said...

Oh, y'know, same as happened to most of my stuff. Which was hellishly difficult to explain to my DCI, when I wasn't even out at work.

And yes, it is, Mielegrappolo.

You're the perfect height. Perfect.

And I think next week, when Sherlock's off, you two should do extensive testing regarding cupcakes and muffins. I'll help eat the result.

Liz said...

Lestrade - I quite like this italian take on pet names.

John - I think it sounds much nicer in italian than it does in english.
Sorry about you having a taller sister, however I do also have girl cousins ten years younger than me that are taller so I feel some of your pain.
On the subject of muffins/cupcakes, chocolate anything in a case is just nice never mind what it is called. I should imagine that Sherlock would sniff out anything chocolatey, even if you called it something disgusting like 'sprout cake'!
And as for my co-workers, they will quite literally eat anything that is placed in the break room, especially if they themselves haven't brought it in! -x-x-

mazarin221b@hotmail.com said...

I already got the "Put chocolate chips on the grocery list, 'cause I want chocolate chip muffins, mommy," in my house. At least he isn't asking for prawns or kidneys.

John, how can you not melt when L calls you anything in Italian? I would, no matter what it was! :D

John H. D. Watson said...

I'm sorry, love. That must've been awful, on top of all the rest.

Honey...what? I'm almost afraid to ask.

Chocolate banana muffins vs chocolate banana cupcakes?

mazarin221b said...

Well, Ok. Didn't mean to put my email addy up there (I only typed my name!), but hey. It's my fanbox, so have at it, I suppose!

Tink said...

I hesitate to imagine the amount of sugar Sherlock will consume in the extensive testing that will occur. Maybe you could add that as an additional experiment? Chart the level of... Um. Sherlockness that happens?

Also, I am absolutely so very glad that I am home from work. Assistant decided to try and rebel because of yesterday. However, my darlings greeted me with such enthusiasm that it made up for it. One of my girls *loves* books. At the age of 19 months, I encourage this every chance I get. I had barely got my things put away when she was tugging on my trousers and I had to sit down, pull her in to my lap, and read her story. The others listened for the most part, but it just... felt so right for that moment. I love those moments.

John H. D. Watson said...

Liz & Mazarin - it sounds a lot nicer in Italian, I admit. And chocolate anything is good, yes. Chocolate muffins sound healthier, though I know they're now

Liz said...

mazarin - I'm totally with you on the melting.
John - I should think that with muffins you might be able to get more banana and chocolate in than with a cupcake? This would decide it for me! -x-

Becca said...

Personally, I think of muffins as being denser than cupcakes.

Ha! This brings back vague memories of a scene in the Charlies Angels movie where one of the characters couldn't cook, but her muffins made awesome projectile weapons.

John H. D. Watson said...

Tink - the level of Sherlockness...it's like the Richter scale.

she was tugging on my trousers and I had to sit down, pull her in to my lap, and read her story

That's lovely. :) I've never really been around kids that age for long, but surely that's quite early for that sort of thing? She must be very bright.

Becca said...

Tink - my parents tell stories that when I was around that age, I would chase after them, whack them on the leg with the book I wanted read to me, and scream Book! Book!

They also couldn't keep books on any bookshelves I could reach. I'm sure they were grateful I was an early reader.

John H. D. Watson said...

Becca - Ha. Now I know what to do with the ones that go wrong.

Greg Lestrade said...

It was awkward. And made me look like a complete idiot. But in the grand scheme of things, not so bad.

Honeybunch.

And yes, I could get behind that experiment. Definitely.

Melassa (Well, that's not a very good translation...but it's as close as Italian gets.)

John H. D. Watson said...

I can go and search for the hat tomorrow if you like.

Ha! Back where we started, hm? I dunno, melassa does sound nicer than treacle, but it also sounds a lot like Melissa.

...All right, no it doesn't, not when you say it out loud.

Greg Lestrade said...

no, don't worry. I'm sure it's stuffed in a box somewhere. I mean, unless you feel the urge, and need to entertain yourself playing 'hunt the hat' in my flat.

Melassa literally translates to 'molasses' though, which just...doesn't seem like such a nice thing to call someone?

Guance-dolci.


Now, I need either fewer hours in the day, or a quota of murders which everyone in London agrees not to go over. Or some magic way of catching them which doesn't rely on expensive forensic procedures.

John H. D. Watson said...

Something sweet? No, sweet something? Google is not helping me with this one.

Don't they have treacle in Italy?

quota of murders which everyone in London agrees not to go over

I like this option.

Greg Lestrade said...

Sweet cheeks.

Whether on your faccia or your culo, I let you decide. (I don't think it'll be hard to guess...)

Umm....well, I can't say I've ever needed treacle in Italy. I suppose they do...maybe they call it some sort of variation of molasses.


Yeah, I like that option, too. Sadly...I don't think it'll happen.

paperwork like this makes me want to beat my face against the table top.

John H. D. Watson said...

Heh. Right.

paperwork like this makes me want to beat my face against the table top.

I think it's because they seem to be expecting you to work some sort of magic to get the numbers where they want them.

Greg Lestrade said...

that's what the police do best - magic.

I should probably take this all to court tomorrow, try and get some more done during the waiting around. I'm starting to go cross-eyed tonight.

There'll probably be people there willing to help me beat my face on the table.

John H. D. Watson said...

Heh. One of the boys from Sherlock's class asked me if you could do magic to find bad people like the police in Harry Potter. Turned out he was worried he'd get arrested for sticking gum in his sister's hair.

Greg Lestrade said...

Hope you told him 'yes'. One fewer potential criminal on the streets...

want to rub my shoulders? (how can you refuse such an offer??) :)

John H. D. Watson said...

Only if you take your shirt off.

Greg Lestrade said...

I thought you'd take it off for me...

John H. D. Watson said...

That is also an acceptable option.

Greg Lestrade said...

i do enjoy your healing hands. think I have paper-work-neck, is that a medical condition?

John H. D. Watson said...

Yeah, it means you need a lot of time off to spend lying about in bed with me. I'll write you a prescription.

Greg Lestrade said...

God, don't tempt me.

Should be home early again tomorrow, barring anything particular at work.

I juggled my days to get those two off for Mycroft.

And we'll get some time together soon. Promise.

John H. D. Watson said...

I juggled my days to get those two off for Mycroft.

Thank you, I know he'll be happier having you there, and so will I. I don't think their mum was thinking about work schedules when she set the dates.

John H. D. Watson said...

And we'll get some time together soon. Promise.

We're together right now. :)

Greg Lestrade said...

Well, there's no other way an oik like me will ever get to see inside Eton! (And I know you don't want to go, Mycroft, but humour us old folk who are intrigued to see where all those politicians came from!)

John H. D. Watson said...

I'm looking forward to seeing it too. And seriously considering getting Sherlock a leash for the occasion.

Greg Lestrade said...

We're together right now.

I know that, you big eejit. I meant for lie-ins and lazing about and not having to think about getting up in the morning.

You know, you can honestly massage my shoulders as hard as you like. I won't squirm or try to escape.

John H. D. Watson said...

I know! I'm just saying, this is nice too, so if you're feeling guilty, stoppit.

Ha, all right, yes, I can do it harder.

Greg Lestrade said...

Ha, all right, yes, I can do it harder.

I do like you saying that, Pericolo. ;)

John H. D. Watson said...

Better?

Greg Lestrade said...

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

can't speak or move or anything

John H. D. Watson said...

Excellent, I'll take that as a yes.

Greg Lestrade said...

yes. yes. it's a yes.

need to go to bed.

can't move.

John H. D. Watson said...

Hmm. You've got a problem then. I'll just toss you over my shoulder and carry you off, shall I?

Greg Lestrade said...

yes. toss me off, although doing it over your shoulder sounds...like some very odd position.

:D

c'mon, I may manage to make it to the bedroom.

And I need to find my tie for the morning.

John H. D. Watson said...

I'm sure you can manage. You are a good tosser, after all.

I think I saw it with your socks.

Greg Lestrade said...

I am. Practice makes perfect.

So get practicing :D

John H. D. Watson said...

Ha. Yes sir, Inspector.

Greg Lestrade said...

I need to add a new option to my coffee poll. Coffee from court.

I think they brew it out of bitterness and despair.

John H. D. Watson said...

You mean like marmite?

Greg Lestrade said...

Is that where I got that from?knew I wasn't poetic enough to think it up on my own.

except marmite is made of the voices of angels and rainbows.

I feel crap, Danger. can I have a note to come home sick and watch daytime soaps on the sofa?

John H. D. Watson said...

I think the vegemite song said sadness, batteries, and asses, so yours is actually more poetic.

Aww. Shall I come and fetch you?

Greg Lestrade said...

Don't think even your I'm not shouting army doctor voice will persuade an old Bailey judge to end the sitting for me.

John H. D. Watson said...

What if we tell the judge s/he can go home and watch soaps and eat ice cream as well? That ought to do it, surely.

Greg Lestrade said...

He looks more the sort to eat soap and watch ice cream.

Still, not long to go now.

Sherlock said...

Why would you watch ice cream? It would just melt.

Greg Lestrade said...

I mean he seems a bit joyless, Sherlock. Can't say more or i'll be up in front of a professional conduct board.

Sally said...

Sending him back to you, John. He looks a bit peaky. Probably that shit coffee he insists on drinking.

Greg Lestrade said...

Do not look anything of the sort.

But am on the way home.

John H. D. Watson said...

Thanks, Sally.

L - do you feel too crap to eat brownie? Because there are some.

Greg Lestrade said...

Why does it rain whenever I want to get from a to b?

Dunno. Feel a bit sick. Might just have some toast.

I'll decide once I've smelt the brownish.

Be in in a sec.

John H. D. Watson said...

You don't really look well actually. Headache?

Greg Lestrade said...

just a bit...dizzy. like I'm a bit drunk.

i'm sure some water and a cuddle and some sleep and I'll be fine.

John H. D. Watson said...

I can provide that I think.

Anon Without A Name said...

Sounds unpleasant :-( Hope you feel better soon, Lestrade.

Desert Wanderer said...

Sally, you must have attended the John Watson School of Lestrade Wrangling (tm). Clearly, you passed with flying colors. (Good to see you again, how's the arm?)

John, you could probably provide doctorate-level training in lots of things, but cuddles seem to be an area of particular speciality...

Greg Lestrade said...

Cheers Nameless.

Desert Wanderer - she did not 'send me home'! We were done for the day.

John is very very good at cuddles though. Which is why I unashamedly ask for them. Been a long time since I could do that.

John H. D. Watson said...

John is very very good at cuddles though.

I'm getting a lot of practice, that's why. And you're a good teacher, of course.

Greg Lestrade said...

told you last night -practice makes perfect.

good teacher? demanding, I'll give you, good, I'm not so sure.

John H. D. Watson said...

Good teachers always demand the best of their students.

Greg Lestrade said...

I am feeling a bit better.. Thanks, Doc Danger.

John H. D. Watson said...

A bit's better than nothing. Still, I'd be glad to keep you home in bed tomorrow; consider it a standing offer.

Greg Lestrade said...

offer? That's some wicked temptation, that's what it is.

Well...not if I am actually feeling ill. Then it's a waste.

But seriously, too much work, too little time.

Is it Sherlock's sports thing tomorrow? I thought you said it was...I forget.

John H. D. Watson said...

Sherlock's been saying it was "tomorrow" since Friday. I had to call Mrs T, and yes, it is in fact really tomorrow this time. Can you make it?

Greg Lestrade said...

errrr....afternoon?

I'll have to see.

John H. D. Watson said...

Okay. You can tell the people at work you have to go and practice your tossing.

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