Wednesday, September 21, 2011

IT'S MY BIRTHDAY

Hello it's Sherlock again, I'm posting from John's phone because I'm BORED and stuck in stupid traffic and no one will tell me what my surprise is. School was fun and I guess I'm glad I went because Mrs T brought in cake and Mendia and Peter even gave me presents.

One was this massive dead bug she found which was really brilliant and I'm going to dry it out and pin it to a card like the bugs in the museum, and Peter's was a water pistol, but Mrs T said I couldn't fill it up until I got home and I'm not home yet because John and I never went there after school, we walked around and got a snack and went to the park. He said I was bothering the ducks, but I only wanted to see their feathers better to see how the water slides off them.

And after my surprise we're going to have pizza and liquid nitrogen ice cream and it will be amazing. I hope we get ice cream and then pizza because I don't want to be too full of pizza for ice cream. 

102 comments:

Greg Lestrade said...

There's a simple way to ensure you have room for ice cream... don't eat too much pizza. We can take what you don't eat away with us, and you can take it to school for lunch tomorrow. So don't stuff yourself.

And Happy Birthday. It's a pleasure knowing you. I don't think I've ever felt as welcomed into someone's life as you make me feel, and it's an honour watching you grow up.

You're a fantastic person, and I hope this is the first of many birthdays you celebrate with us.

Sherlock said...

I love you too.

Are you sure we can't get ice cream first? Pizza for school would be okay though.

Mycroft said...

Happy birthday, Sprog.

I think I shall see you all at the weekend, so I can give you your present then.

I hope you enjoy your surprise.

Sherlock said...

Do you know what it is too???? TELL MEEEEE.

Greg Lestrade said...

Pizza first. That's just how it works.

What do you want on yours? The answer cannot be 'ice cream'.

Sherlock said...

Everything!

Greg Lestrade said...

Right. Of course.

And you don't need to pester anyone to spill about the surprise. We're here.

Sherlock said...

Finally!!

Greg Lestrade said...

I need to study his interrogation technique. It's pretty good.

Never would have thought I'd be celebrating a birthday here... amazing where life leads.

John H. D. Watson said...

He's over the moon about it though, you were right.

Desert Wanderer said...

I'm dying of curiosity. Are you guys going to share with the rest of the class?

Or, can we guess????

Anon Without A Name said...

Ditto Desert Wanderer - where are you??

And Happy Birthday. It's a pleasure knowing you. I don't think I've ever felt as welcomed into someone's life as you make me feel, and it's an honour watching you grow up.

You're a fantastic person, and I hope this is the first of many birthdays you celebrate with us.

I love you too.


Lestrade, I do believe your six-year-old genius managed to decode your cryptic message :-D

Greg Lestrade said...

I don't think I've ever seen his eyes so wide with no food present.

Sherlock says you have to guess, because no one would tell him forever, so he won't tell.

Bronwyn said...

*wide eyes* Is Sherlock interrogating criminals? Those poor bastards. *laughs*

Oh congratulations, Sherlock! I'm so glad you're having fun! Tell us all about it later, yes?

Hippo Birdie 2 Ewes,
Bronwyn

Elizabeth said...

Is it...the morgue? I have a funny feeling it's the morgue.

Bronwyn said...

Guess?
Interrogating criminals?
Playing in the morgue?
Backroom of a funeral parlor?
Watching/helping a biologist deflesh a skeleton?
Being processed AS a criminal?
Riding a teeny-tiny motor scooter?
On the Jack the Ripper Tour?
In that weird museum they keep in Scotland Yard?

I can keep going.
Bronwyn

Desert Wanderer said...

In a cold room? With what I assume are the most uncomfortable beds ever?

Greg Lestrade said...

Bronwyn - I know he would love the Black Museum, but...well, it'll be a treat for another year.

He's quite annoyed that you've all guessed correctly.

Molly has never been so thoroughly interrogated. She's a total star for letting us do this.

Sherlock said...

Watching/helping a biologist deflesh a skeleton?

How do they do that???

Desert Wanderer said...

How do they do that???

Carefully, I would presume. :D

Tink said...

Oh man Sherlock! That is the greatest surprise ever! You're going to have to do another post telling all your aunties here all about your day!

We love you kiddo <3 Happy Sixth Birthday!

John & Greg: You guys are the best pseudo-parents ever. Tell Molly she's awesome for me!

Greg Lestrade said...

Nameless - Yeah, yet another language he speaks, you're right.

Now, having spent over an hour leaning on a freezer, John and I forming a human blockade between one VERY inquisitive six year old and the recent-dead of London, I definitely need beer and pizza. And may even thaw enough to want ice cream...

Sherlock said...

It's nine and we're not even home yet! I bet I won't have to go to bed till eleven! And pizza and ice cream and Molly showed me everything! Well everything except the dead people but that's still a lot! Best birthday ever!

Greg Lestrade said...

You'll have to go to bed as soon as we're home. Or at least get into your pyjams and ready for bed. You might be lucky enough to get a story.

mazarin221b said...

Sherlock, that sounds like an amazing birthday! Enjoy that pizza and ice cream for us!

Greg Lestrade said...

He's enjoying enough food for all of you, that's for sure.

Greg Lestrade said...

...and weighs a tonne.

When did my job description change from 'DI' to 'DI and part-time steed'?

And is he falling asleep on my shoulders again? He's...sagging.

John H. D. Watson said...

Definitely asleep. I've got him.

John H. D. Watson said...

He definitely weighs more than he did last autumn.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, an outing to the morgue, pizza, ice cream, and falling asleep on his DI's shoulder. That sure sounds like the best birthday ever.

Greg Lestrade said...

This time last Autumn he spent most of his time running wild on a moor...and was only-just-not-4. Which is un-bloody-believable.

He is growing pretty fast.

Hope no one else in London wants ice cream this week. London's run out. Sherlock pulled the 'It's my birthday. I've got a BADGE...' and got extra, free, ice cream... this sets a bad precedent.

I think I need a coffee. and bed.

Anonymous said...

Aww! What a wonderful birthday surprise (and day) for Sherlock! It sounds like all of you had a great day, celebrating.

Greg - Skip the coffee and go straight to bed. No sense in lying about in the middle of the night, staring at the ceiling. ;)

-A from NW

Anonymous said...

Happy birthday Sherlock, I'm pretty sure that much has been arranged though!

(I guessed right in one go btw :D)

Pretty curious what you got him Mycroft! Sherlock will need to do two blogs now; one on the day itself and one on the weekend :)

Lupe said...

Overall, sounds like a pretty awesome birthday! :D I'm glad you enjoyed yourself, sobrino. :3 Please tell us (or politely ask John to tell us) all the details later. :)

John H. D. Watson said...

Lestrade did not get coffee, for anyone who's wondering. He was asleep on the sofa and drooling a bit when I got back from putting Sherlock to bed, and I don't think he woke up properly even when I was getting his trousers off.

Goodnight, everyone.

Anonymous said...

Sherlock, it sounds like you had an amazing birthday! Pizza and ice cream and the morgue sound just perfect for you!

John, Lestrade, you really are the best guardians.

Anonymous said...

Sherlock, I thought about you all day today! Seriously: I was distracted at work thinking about your birthday. I was wondering what you would do and I'm so glad you had a wonderful day!

How does it feel being six?

innie said...

I'm so glad you had an amazing birthday, Sherlock. You deserve it. And isn't it great to know you're so loved?

Bronwyn said...

Okay Sherlock, consider this your birthday present from me. If you want to try it, I recommend starting with chickens as they're pretty easy to work with. I started with chickens in one of my forensics classes. So here you are, How to Deflesh Bones.

http://bronwynferchdai.dreamwidth.org/37329.html

I'm just posting the link out of consideration for the other readers who may not want to read it.
Happy Birthday one more time, Sherlock.
Bronwyn

Tink said...

Bronwyn: I think I love you a little more <3

Sherlock: I'm serious about you making a blog post young man! :D Looking forward to it!

John & Greg: Happy Sherlock's Birthday guys! Sweet dreams!

Greg Lestrade said...

A - a mug of coffee wouldn't keep me awake (which probably says a lot about the levels of consumption I indulge in) but anyway, as John said, I was out like a light. (not drooling)

And now I'm up cooking Sherlock eggs for breakfast, despite his pleas for pancakes 'because it's still my birthday until we've done everything and I haven't had all my presents yet and we haven't gone on holiday and that means it's still my birthday and I should get pancakes now'.

Rider said...

Out like a light? Considering I don't think he woke up properly even when I was getting his trousers off. you must have been!

Sounds like an exhausting but enjoyable day for everyone.

Maybe when he's seven he'll be big enough to ride on the bike....

Greg Lestrade said...

He may have been exaggerating slightly.

I admit I was...pliant. but it's very rare I object to Danger removing my trousers...

Rider said...

Oh I didn't think you'd object. But not even noticing?

(The falling asleep is usually done a bit later in the proceedings after all.)

Greg Lestrade said...

I noticed, just enough to know it was him dragging me into the bedroom and ripping my clothes off. And let him get on with it.

After a very early Sherlock alarm call and a day at work hanging onto my temper by a thread, followed by an evening of excitement and laughter and a manic 6 yr old I wasn't good for anything except sleep.

Desert Wanderer said...

Glad to hear it was a good one, Sherlock. You certainly deserve it.

Happy anniversary, John, and many happy returns. Are you planning a "year in review"? :)

Tink said...

Happy Birthday To John's Blog! :D

Hope you guys have a great day!

Greg Lestrade said...

Danger, two questions - what do you know about this Friday afternoon, and how do you feel about massages?

Okay, three questions - you having a nice day?

Bronwyn said...

Ahem, I just feel the need to say

BLOG PARTY!!!

http://www.renoirgallery.com/paintings/large/renoir-luncheon-of-the-boating-party.jpg

That is all,
Bronwyn

Elizabeth said...

Happy blogday to you!
Happy blogday to you!
Happy blogday dear Nothing Happens to Meeeee,
Happy blogday to you!

John H. D. Watson said...

L - there was definitely drooling.

1. I am having a nice day actually. Are you?
2. Not much. Why, has Mrs H said something to you?
3. I like them? I mean, I like yours anyway.

Also between last night and read everyone's comments this morning, I managed to forget again that I've been writing this thing for a year. Good god.

Becca said...

Happy blog birthday!

You make my nights of insomnia brighter. :P

Greg Lestrade said...

I was probably dreaming about you. That would make me drool. You undressing me probably fitted right into that dream.

1. Good. Any particular reason? Did his highness have a nice day at school too? Mine is not bad. Considerable improvement over yesterday.
2. No one has said anything to me, but my organiser, which only I have access to, and the rota, which only this department has access to, both show I have the afternoon off. I have not booked the afternoon off. No one here claims to know anything about it. I think I can guess who is behind this.
3. How about not-mine?

What do you want for dinner? You can have a birthday dinner for your blog.

John H. D. Watson said...

Ooh. Curry and Bakewell tart? I can do the shopping if we need anything.

1. He did, and, possibly related to point 2, got a letter from his mum in the post today, which he is positively gleeful about and will not let me see until you get home.
2. That does sound like her.
3. Probably all right? Why?

Greg Lestrade said...

Okay. Do we need anything? I don't know what we've got in the cupboards.

1. Good. Glad he's happy. He did say he never had good birthdays...nice to think we've helped change that.
2. That's what i thought. Suddenly things like this happening don't surprise me any more.
3. Well, some people don't like being touched by/getting their kit of in front of, strangers. And some people don't like seeing their boyfriends being massaged by strangers and...I needed to check.

John H. D. Watson said...

We have all the spices and things from last time, and we have rice. And there's chicken to go in it. What else does curry need? And we have jam of course.

1. Me too.
2. I really do wonder how this is my life sometimes.
3. I don't honestly know how I'll be about being touched by strangers, which is why I said probably all right. But I'm willing to give it a go. Not going to tell me what you're planning, are you? Apart from massages, obviously.

Small Hobbit said...

Happy Blog Day

And Bronwyn - that really does look like us all at the Blog party.

Bronwyn said...

I love Bakewell tarts! All almondy and wonderful! I toasted my sliced almonds and roll them in cinnamon and nutmeg before adding them to the top. Mmmmmmmmm.

Good luck with that!
Bronwyn

Greg Lestrade said...

Curry doesn't need jam, no matter how much you like jam...

3. There's nothing to tell yet! We just talked about getting away for a couple of days, just the two of us, so I started thinking about it.

You ever been to Bath?

As for massages, apart from you, and probably a handful of other people, I don't like being that...I don't know the word. Vulnerable? Exposed? With other blokes. But I don't mind it with women. So if you like the idea, I'll be asking the place for a masseuse, not a masseur. If you have a preference, feel free to express it (not here, if you don't want.)

Greg Lestrade said...

(Of course, you could always not have a massage at all, and get a nice manicure, or a back, sack and crack wax...your choice ;) )

John H. D. Watson said...

1. I have not been to Bath, but I would love to go with you.
2. I am never getting anything waxed.
3. I have no preference, either is fine.

The jam was for the tart, not the curry!

Sherlock said...

Bronwyn, thank you for the defleshing post, I tried to say thank you there but it wouldn't let me without an account and I didn't want to make one. I want to deflesh things now and I don't think John will let me in the flat but I'm going to ask Mrs T if we can do it at school or maybe as a field trip!

Bronwyn said...

I flinched just at the mention of crack wax. Just FYI. Legs are painful enough. Well, and eyebrows.
Ooer!
Bronwyn

Greg Lestrade said...

1. Good (not that you haven't been. That's bad! It's nice! But good that you'd like to go with me.)
2. Bet you have. Can't believe you got through medical school without either pranks or sponsored something-or-other involving waxing. Or were just curious. But I would rather you stayed as you were, which is perfect.
3. Okay.

And I know, idiot. I think last time I just used up some veg we had around to bulk out the curry.

Bronwyn - I don't put much almond on top of mine, because I embed slices of pear into the mix on top. (Partly because I don't like jam, so have minimal jam beneath the cake mixture...Danger's half gets all the jam. And pears. And everything.)

Bronwyn said...

You're welcome, Sherlock! I'm glad you enjoyed it. It can be pretty smelly, so maybe something that shouldn't be done indoors. I'm sorry you couldn't comment. I didn't realize I had turned commenting off. It's back on now.

One of my professors in college taught me how. He used to deflesh small animal and articulate the skeletons to display in his classroom. It was amazing. I do hope Mrs. T helps you find an alternative.

Toodle-pip,
Bronwyn

Greg Lestrade said...

Bronwyn - it's the idea of the sack wax that brings tears to my eyes. Think I could just about cope with the rest. Maybe. But...yeah, not thinking about it. Have crossed my legs though.

Sherlock - defleshing things at school sounds like a much better idea.

John H. D. Watson said...

No waxing incidents, but someone did shave all my hair and eyebrows off and trim off my eyelashes. You wouldn't believe how annoying it is not to have eyelashes.

Jam's not entirely unlike chutney. I bet you could eat it with curry.

Greg Lestrade said...

Never mind annoying...how ridiculous did you look without hair or eyebrows? Were you far enough through your training to be treating people? Not sure I'd trust a doctor with obviously-shaved hair and eyebrows...

I look like a thug when I have my head shaved. People give me wary looks and move away from me, as if I may just spontaneously start a fight. And I always forget I don't have hair and try to push my hands through it anyway.

Could, perhaps. But I would choose not to.

John H. D. Watson said...

Completely ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous. And sort of like an alien. People were wary.

When did you shave your head, or was it shaved for you?

Greg Lestrade said...

Well, as a kid it would be done whenever we all got headlice. Mum insisted. Always just when I'd got my hair to a decent length, too, I seem to remember.

Since then - a couple of times I've chosen to, a couple of times it's been done to me.

John H. D. Watson said...

I'm trying to imagine Sherlock with a shaved head now, and I just can't do it.

Greg Lestrade said...

Ha! Me neither.

Anyway, you'd miss fight night if you didn't have to help him wash it and get all the tangles/twigs/frogs/foliage/chemicals/substances of unknown origin out of it.

Tink said...

John: You should post a Blog Party post :D Just sayin'. You know us! Any excuse for a party!

It's been such a privledge to get to know you. You, the boys, (Mrs H to an extent), the security crew, and of course, Greg.

I guess what I'm saying is that I adore you guys and I'm glad you've been writing for so long and will continue to do so <3

John H. D. Watson said...

Tink - done. :)

Anon Without A Name said...

a couple of times it's been done to me.

Lestrade, I really shouldn't ask about that, should I? So I will innocently enquire as to whether you've had anything waxed, instead :-)

Greg Lestrade said...

Nothing dodgy! Shaved once in hospital, once for a case when I had to go undercover. It doesn't suit me.

As for waxing, yeah, had my chest waxed for charity years ago. I have no idea why anyone would ever put themselves through that on a regular basis. It hurt doing it, it felt weird afterward and looking in the mirror I felt like I had rewound back to puberty. I won't be repeating the experience.

John H. D. Watson said...

...You had your chest waxed for charity? How did this happen exactly? Was Sally involved?

Greg Lestrade said...

No. It was pre Sally.

It was a coven of female officers, though, who clearly had issues with the beauty regimes society forced upon them. And hated men. Or something.

There were five or six of us who were forced into it, in public. They handcuffed us to chairs so we couldn't escape. Bullying in the workplace, I think they call it now...

but it was all for charity, so therefore we couldn't complain. Although clearly I am now. :)

Anon Without A Name said...

It hurts less if you get it done more often...

And yeah, I'm pretty sure these days Met must have policies about handcuffing semi-naked officers to chairs and assaulting them with hot wax. At least, I hope it does :-p

(Mind you, it probably has policies about using "coven" as a collective noun for female officers, too, even apparently sadistic ones)

John H. D. Watson said...

Or they just wanted to see you without your shirt on.

Greg Lestrade said...

Nameless - I have no desire to ever get it done again, let alone 'often'.

I think they had policies then. They were just ignored in favour of 'charity'. And yes, probably. But it feels like the right word... ;)

Danger - only you would think that.

John H. D. Watson said...

Me and anyone who's seen you.

Greg Lestrade said...

In fairly sure most criminals, judges, lawyers etc. don't spend their time in my presence imagining me shirtless, actually.

Anyway, yeah. Rather have a tattoo than ever wax anything again.

John H. D. Watson said...

A tattoo of what?

Greg Lestrade said...

Anything.

A big sign saying 'it is illegal to wax this body'.

Or 'I love Danger' stamped between my shoulderblades.

I don't know. But it couldn't hurt more than that did.

Anon Without A Name said...

A tattoo where? :-p

L: Danger - only you would think that.

J: Me and anyone who's seen you.


And once again I'm going to trust John on this one. And Sally: "John, you need to keep this man of yours on a leash or something. Striding in here this morning, dressed in leather and with a tan, [...] half of the officers in were virtually drooling!".

Greg Lestrade said...

Nameless - Sal just does it to embarrass me.

John H. D. Watson said...

Pfft.

Greg Lestrade said...

Orgy to you too.

Greg Lestrade said...

Pfft I mean! Bloody autocorrect.

John H. D. Watson said...

HA! That is the best autocorrect in history.

Greg Lestrade said...

Do you programme my phone to do this? I swear I've never typed 'orgy' on here in my life, yet it chooses to 'correct' me to it?

Come to bed. For all we know tomorrow we'll be sleeping in hammocks (that 'corrected' to Dimmock. I have no desire to sleep in a colleague, I assure you) or in a submarine or something.

John H. D. Watson said...

I did nothing to your phone! I feel sure you must've typed orgy at some point. I wouldn't want you to sleep in Dimmock either.

Right, coming.

Greg Lestrade said...

I can think of no reason for me ever to type orgy. (which NOW it wants to change to Pfft. Now it's too late.)

John H. D. Watson said...

Ha. I bet six months ago you couldn't think of a reason ever to discuss which one of us would get pregnant, and yet now we've had that discussion twice...

Greg Lestrade said...

That's...different. those were discussions with you. I've never discussed orgies with anyone, and don't want you thinking I have! My phone is making me feel guilty for something I haven't even done!

John H. D. Watson said...

I wasn't suggesting you'd discussed them with anyone else - except perhaps our blog readers. It just sounds like a completely possible conversational topic around here.

Greg Lestrade said...

Mm. True.

Right. Bed. Would you mind packing a bag for me tomorrow?

Sherlock is going to be off the scale of excitement, isn't he? It's nice to see, if tiring to keep up with.

John H. D. Watson said...

Sure. Is there anything in particular you want?

He is going to be a tiny whirlwind of joy.

Greg Lestrade said...

Sorry, um, not really. Jeans, shirts, a t shirt, a hoody in case it's cold. Think we need swimming stuff or anything? I suppose chuck it in, just in case? Shorts to sleep in... anything else Mrs H hints at! Thanks.

Anon Without A Name said...

Have a great weekend away, all :-)

Sherlock - enjoy the plane journey!

Anonymous said...

Happy belated birthday, Sherlock. I'm sorry I missed it. It sounds like you had an excellent time.

Happy anniversary of your blog, Doctor.

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