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1. We have courgettes! Or at least we have flowers and possibly the very small beginnings of courgettes. I don't think I remembered that the plants got this large. Mum used to grow them, and I remember them as being big, but lots of things look big when you're seven.
2. I found out the origin of the word honeymoon today, or at least I heard a story explaining its origin. I'm not going to vouch for it being true, but it sounds plausible. Apparently the ancient Persians believed that honey was an aphrodisiac and they drank it, or possibly some sort of honey drink, for a month (moon) after they got married.
I also learned that the Aztecs thought avocados were an aphrodisiac on the theory that they were wrinkly and grew in pairs...
1. We have courgettes! Or at least we have flowers and possibly the very small beginnings of courgettes. I don't think I remembered that the plants got this large. Mum used to grow them, and I remember them as being big, but lots of things look big when you're seven.
2. I found out the origin of the word honeymoon today, or at least I heard a story explaining its origin. I'm not going to vouch for it being true, but it sounds plausible. Apparently the ancient Persians believed that honey was an aphrodisiac and they drank it, or possibly some sort of honey drink, for a month (moon) after they got married.
I also learned that the Aztecs thought avocados were an aphrodisiac on the theory that they were wrinkly and grew in pairs...
70 comments:
....is that why they're called avocado pairs?
We can make sure Mrs Holmes has whatever hotel we pick stock up on the honey... although not sure we need it? ;)
Yes. That is definitely why.
Honey and...I can't think of anything else commonly thought of as an aphrodisiac that I actually want to eat, never mind. And yeah, I think we're doing all right in that area...
Asparagus...but that has unfortunate other consequences!
Keep an eye on those courgettes. Pick a few of the male flowers if you can and still leave some. I'll stuff them and cook them.
If our room comes stocked with honey, avocados, and asparagus, I know who to blame...
Oh, excellent! Can't wait.
You...thought about that at all. First night?
Or...well, anything else about the day, really :)
I've started writing my vows...
Sort of, a bit? Not really very useful thoughts.
Going to let me see them before the day?
You can definitely see them!
I didn't know which music might be nice.
Now I have too many things I like. Depending on...you know, how it goes, and what we need music for...
Thank goodness. I'm nervous enough about mine as it is.
How many songs are there on the list now as compared to when you played me a few before?
there are now... well. Our first dance, which is obviously set, because we're learning it all.
Then there's three others I really like (and lots more I sort of like). But...I mean, well, it depends when we need music for? But basically, entering and leaving! Which is two.
That's not bad - I was afraid you were going to say you'd narrowed it down to fifty!
I had to stop. And then give myself some very strict criteria, regarding length, intro-length, language, appropriate-ness etc. to weed some out.
Want to play them for me? I suppose not tonight, it's a bit late, but tomorrow?
Yeah. I mean - you'll probably know them all. They're classics.
I'm sure they'll be good. :)
We just...yeah, need to do things :) Like send out invites, and get our suits, and decide who's doing what and where and how the day will run...
but right now this sofa is rather comfy with you on it :)
I keep feeling like I'm going to inevitably do or say something to screw it up between now and then. Could use a hug if you don't mind.
I'm sure you won't.
Come and lie on me so I can wrap you in a full hug.
Talk, if you want. It's...normal to be nervous. I mean, I think it is.
Okay. Yeah...talking might be good. Not on here though.
Thanks.
No, not here. real talking.
I love you. I honestly believe I will always love you. In the time I've known you, there has never been anything to make me doubt that I will always love you, and that my life is a million times better with you in it. Ok?
That...helps a lot actually. I love you too. And...yeah, everything you just said. I'm so unbelievably lucky to have you.
And me you, you big soppy sod.
Sherlock was telling me earlier that you should be allowed to drive an ambulance. And asking if you could feed chickens magnets to get magnetic eggs.... do I sense a sports day on the horizon?
It wouldn't surprise me if they needed an ambulance at his sports day... It's Friday, yeah. He said we weren't allowed to do the three legged race together again...
He told me I had to do the sack race. I asked why. He just looked at me from under his (very long) fringe and said 'It's obvious, isn't it?'....and I still have no idea why.
He said you were allowed to 'just run' in case someone needed your medical help, you couldn't be tied to me, or in a sack, or 'anything else'...which makes me wonder what other options there are??
Anything else... I'm not sure I want to know.
It's not obvious to me either. Now I'm just staring at you wondering why it's obvious you'd...do well in a sack. So to speak.
Ha! Well, you should know...and he shouldn't!
You haven't ever made some oblique reference to me being fantastic in the sack for him to overhear and misinterpret, have you? (You can say 'yes' just to caress my ego, if you want...) ;)
Not to him, but he does seem to manage to overhear just about everything in this flat...and Mrs Hudson's.
Mmm. He asked me why Mrs H had called someone 'dishy' the other day. I have no idea of the origins of that, so it just became an argument over whether dishes could ever be considered good-looking.
And which side of the argument were you on? And who was Mrs H calling dishy??
I was on my side ;) err...well, I was just saying maybe it came from something like that, and he was claiming it 'couldn't' (because that was stupid). So, given I didn't really believe what I was saying...neither side?
And I don't know! He's the one with bat-ears, not me!
I was imagining you arguing that dishes could be attractive, given how you feel about your wok.
Hmmm.
My wok isn't a dish!
My Le Creuset terrine is actually a very good looking dish though. I would go as far as to call it sexy. I'd forgotton about that one... and my cast pot.
I shall inform him in the morning.
Ha!
And now you've distracted me with aphrodisiacs, dishyness, and getting me in the sack and look at the time!
it's even almost cool enough to wrap myself around you in bed tonight I reckon.
Well, come along and let's get you in the sack then!
Mm, good.
John--If you're nervous about speaking/standing in front of folks, the key is to get a friend to be the officiant (is that allowed over there?), and them make sure that friend is more nervous than you. Then a) you can keep yourself calm by reassuring them and b) no one will notice your nerves because they'll be noticing the officiant's.
I know this to be a workable strategy because that's what my friends did to me when they got married. ;)
It's not that. More my astounding ability to screw up relationships.
I offer the much-quoted "“every relationship you are in will fail, until one doesn't,**" which seems right to me--and you guys sure sound like one that doesn't. :) I mean--you both work at it; you communicate, and share, and support, and give--all the hard bits, in addition to the being in love bit.
**It was originally said by Dan Savage, one of the founders of the It Gets Better Project. Nice, eh?
John--I don't know if this is reassuring or not (and I respect that I'm not the person you want to talk to about this), but look at it this way: the way you phrased it implies, however unconsciously, that you think that screwing up relationships is a behavior or ability. That means it's also in your ability to change. It's under your control. It's not like they implode all by themselves, outside of your sphere of influence. The fact that your relationship with Lestrade has worked so far is not independent of your contribution to it, either; quite the opposite. Open yourself up to the possibility that you sometimes have an astounding ability to get things right. :)
And I hope you get some sleep soon.
Dunno if I agree with that, RR. Not that I can entirely explain why. I think it's to do with the word 'fail'.
I just ... I guess I look at it this way - when you think of it failing, how does it make you feel? Does it make you just feel resigned and like there's nothing you can do? Or do you think, you know, that you'd fight. That you'd do aost anything. That you would, at that point, try your absolute hardest to work together and figure things out.
Because that's what you have to do, sometimes. And you know, you've done it before. After Ttid, after you got me back, neither of us knew what to do! And it would have been easy to just drift apart, and despite that, and despite everything going on then, we worked it out. We did that. And we'd try and do it again, you know we would. It doesn't just happen or not happen, out of our control. Relationships take work, and I think we've both shown we'll work for ours.
Well, yes, L, that's what I said--you both work at it, and do the hard parts.
(And I would think any lasting relationship needs two people who are both willing to work at it, two people who are both uktimately willing to communicate, and share, and support, and give ; who are both willing to take on the hard parts--and I definitely think you've both shown you'll do that by both doing just that.)
I meant I didn't think I entirely agreed with the quote.
Mm. Well, it's a sound bite, isn't it? It's got truth in it, but it can't be the whole story.
I think.. Well, I'd like to say most of the relationships I've had which ended haven't been failures. They've just come to a natural end. It strikes me a little like saying that death means your life has been a failure. It's as much about the journey as the end result. For me, anyway.
For me the trouble with that quote is that there's no positive message because there's always the thought that "this is the next relationship that's going to fail".
But I'm with L entirely. There's a determination on both your parts to make it work, so it's not reliant on just one person.
Yeah, I agree that some relationships are just finite--they end, rather than fail. But you aren't going to get nuance in a quotable quote! That's for the discussion time after. ;)
SH--I have to disagree with you about the "message" of the quote. To me it is totally saying, "Don't be discouraged just because past relationships may have ended--keep trying, you'll find the one that won't."
SH - it sounds a bit passive to me too. And sort of...like the people involved have little say in it, almost.
Also, a sort of backhanded message that staying together is the symbol of 'success', and should be prized.
I don't know, it might e a soundbite, but to me, personally, it isn't accurate or helpful, if I'm honest. And the more I've thought about it, the more I feel that way. Bt then, yeah, soundbites are often very unhelpful without context. Which is why the press love them - because they can be twisted to suit.
I think, also, you may be reacting more negatively to the word "fail" than was intended by Savage; I've seen it quoted all over the place, always as a positive message.
(Whereas for me, "failure" is not at all a negative concept--one of tai chi's major precepts is to invest in failure (also translated as invest in loss). It's a multi-layered concept which has specific application to the physical practice of tai chi push hands, but it also is an instruction on how to learn--try and fail, try and fail, that's the only way to advance, so every failure is a step forward, and after 16 years I've clearly internalized that definition!)
I think things often quoted often stop people thinking more deeply about what it means to them. It's easier to go with what you're told it means.
I've never done tai chi, but I imagine you get a lot more opportunity for failure, practice and re-trying than in relationships. You're sometimes very lucky to even know what you did wrong in a relationship, let alone get a second chance.
...
If I may ask, I don't think I understand what we're disagreeing about here.
To back up a bit...last night, John made a comment about his "astounding ability to screw up relationships." I responded to him, I think appropriately, with I offer the much-quoted "every relationship you are in will fail, until one doesn't," which seems right to me--and you guys sure sound like one that doesn't. :) That is to say, I don't think it's a matter of screwing up relationships as finding the right relationship. Since that is clearly an incomplete comment--it doesn't say what makes a relationship that "doesn't fail" (or more accurately one that doesn't end, which is what I read it as saying), or why I think yours is one of those, I added my reasoning: I mean--you both work at it; you communicate, and share, and support, and give--all the hard bits, in addition to the being in love bit.
So which part of what I said are you disagreeing with? I don't mind arguing, but at this point I don't know what we're arguing about.
(The precept "invest in failure" (or "invest in loss," depending on the translation) is meant to apply to tai chi, of course, but also to life, including relationships. The idea that failure is not a reason to quit, but is a reason to try again (hopefully to try something else!) is a Taoist concept--but it is shared to some extent in the West by "if at first you don't succeed," etc. I find the "invest in failure" formulation less annoying, but that's me.)
I'm not arguing with anything you said. I'm explaining my reasons for not liking that 'sound bite'. It's my opinion, not one I expect others to share, or to be persuaded by, just mine.
If the guy has said 'all relationships end' I wouldn't have as much issue with it. But 'fail' is far more loaded than 'end' in my opinion. As I said, not an opinion I expect or need anyone to agree with. But nor do I mind if people want to explain why they don't agree. I'm generally up for a discussion about such things.
Ah. I agree that "end" would have been a less loaded, more accurate term. It's what I read it as meaning, certainly. (He's an advice columnist, among other things, so I would guess it was a response to a question which used the word "fail", but that's just a guess.)
Hope you're having fun, Danger. All I got from Sherlock phoning was high pitched noises and something about dogs and hosepipes...
All this serious discussion and all I can do is think about Sherlock with bat ears. Possibly upside down.
Here's a bit of internet oddness to try:
Go to the British Vogue website. Let it load all the way, then scroll to the bottom of the page. Then enter: up arrow, up arrow, down arrow, down arrow, left arrow, right arrow, left arrow, right arrow, b, a, enter
(It will be different every time!)
(And of course, the instructions are "up up, down down, left right, left right B A Start". :))
Anon - he does hang upside down a lot. He may well be part bat.
He's just learned that hanging upside down while squirting water at the dogs results in getting his face licked off...
Just leaving, Danger. You boys got anything planned for tomorrow ? Apart from school, Sherlock.
Think I might need to have the hose turned on me.
Do you smell like death?
I...hope I don't smell. But I have been surrounded by a completely vile smell for half the day. It might have clung on. You'll have to tell me.
Jesus, I feel like I'll be smelling it for a week. And I've had two showers now.
What was it ??
It was a dead person, a dead dog, and a lot of sewage. In this heat the smell was really quite....strong.
Why was there sewage? Is it the worst thing you smelled ever?
We think there might be another creature - dead - blocking the pipes somewhere. It's all a bit of a mess.
It's...probably not, no. I think there are worse smells. But really rotting bodies are fairly high up there.
It sounds like you've had an 'interesting' day Greg!
I'm glad we have the police force we do but we really put you through it don't we?!
Do you smell like death?
And here I thought he was just hot and sweaty and wanted a cold shower to cool off...
-ella
I remember reading a few years ago that there's been a huge growth (in the US, anyway) of companies that specialize in cleaning up after death, especially very messy death. I can't even imagine. O_O
Here, have some sparkly unicorns and rainbows! http://www.cornify.com/. (If you don't feel like using their "Cornify" button, try the Konami code on it, and then keep hitting enter. :))
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