Early this morning - and I do mean early - L woke me up and said he had something very serious to tell me. What was it, I asked, still groggy but trying very hard to be awake and supportive and really listen rather than wonder why I'd been dreaming of giant snails.
'John,' he said. 'I think I have feelings for Anthea. She's made me discover a part of myself I never knew existed. A...[dramatic pause] heterosexual part. So I'm really sorry, but we're going to run off together and start a school for ninjas. You can enroll if you want, we'd be honoured to have you.'
Once my brain got past the initial sleepy panic and the 'feelings for Anthea(???)' part and processed the ninja school, obviously I had to pummel him with pillows until...matters were resolved.
I'm very glad I don't go out and try to drink myself into an early grave for my birthday anymore - April Fool's Day, at medical school, with a hangover, is something everyone should do their best to avoid.
'John,' he said. 'I think I have feelings for Anthea. She's made me discover a part of myself I never knew existed. A...[dramatic pause] heterosexual part. So I'm really sorry, but we're going to run off together and start a school for ninjas. You can enroll if you want, we'd be honoured to have you.'
Once my brain got past the initial sleepy panic and the 'feelings for Anthea(???)' part and processed the ninja school, obviously I had to pummel him with pillows until...matters were resolved.
I'm very glad I don't go out and try to drink myself into an early grave for my birthday anymore - April Fool's Day, at medical school, with a hangover, is something everyone should do their best to avoid.
68 comments:
It wasn't that early!
Love you. :)
That is fantastic as April fools go Greg but seriously mean!!
I'm glad you got your revenge John ;-)
L - I love you too. But it wasn't even six yet!
Before six am? Seriously cruel! Still, I suppose that gave him time to... make it up to you :-)
Wasn't it? Ah, sorry.
AnonyBob - he's got a mean left hook with a pillow, so I think we're even.
Granted, that's not really early, considering when we're usually awakened...
And it was our last morning in the mill! We had to enjoy it..
I'm glad it's school holidays, even if we're home.
And it was enjoyable...
Yeah, me too. :)
You got any plans? I'll have some more time off...sometime. I'll sort it out tomorrow, so we could go and see the allotment together?
That'd be great, yeah! I suppose it's still too cold to plant things?
I wouldn't have thought so...but maybe? Depends if the ground is frozen I suppose.
We should probably make some cold frames or something, too. Maybe get some seedlings going on the windowsills at home?
Yeah...it has to warm up eventually, right?
I hope so...
Reg might have some things already planted, or...something. We might inherit stuff. I mean, I imagine he hasn't just been ignoring the half of the plot we're getting... But he did say we couldn't have any of the greenhouse, because it's full, and he finds it easy to work in there.
Not sure I'd want Sherlock charging about in a greenhouse anyway, that sounds like a recipe for disaster. I know you can plant lettuce and spinach and things when it's still pretty chilly.
I want a laboratory not a greenhouse! and I read a webpage and it said if you planted strawberries it could take THREE YEARS before you get strawberries! We have to get them faster
And I still want to go to ninja school
It was a joke, Sherlock. There is no Ninja School. Sorry.
If Lestrade and Anthea start a ninja school, I'm sure they'll let you attend.
I think there's a kind that lets you harvest the first year, but if not we'll just have to be patient. What other sort of fruit do you want to try growing?
DURIAN
...yeah, could have seen that coming.
No durian. What fruit do you want to grow that doesn't smell so bad it's forbidden on public transport?
I don't knooooooow things that taste nice. An african cucumber.
...How about blueberries?
YES FOR PANCAKES
I think London soil is generally acidic - from my many years of digging corpses out of it - and I think blueberries like acidic soil?
(And...the soil isn't acidic because I dig corpses out of it...that came out wrong, and I can't fix it.)
Sherlock - before you ask, no, we can't bury corpses under our blueberries.
they used to bury placentas under gooseberry bushes apparently, When they stopped eating them that is.
They would be fertiliser though
If we find an unwanted placenta, we'll give it a try, Anon!
No corpses, Sherlock.
We can always see if a few people would give us some spare strawberry plants. I'm sure people have extras sometimes. You can work your charm, Sherlock. Without offering any corpse-fertiliser in return, thanks.
(I hereby commiserate with any of you who've been enjoying the long weekend and have to work tomorrow.)
sorry you're back tomorrow Greg, I guess its the same as when Sherlock doesn't want to leave the park, if you don't stop having fun you can't look forward to having more fun again later ;-)
Good luck with mount paperwork!
L - do you want to get lunch tomorrow?
I'll have to see if my paperwork and caseload is some gentle foothills or a complete mountain range and get back to you.
(Of course I want to...)
Bed? I promise to protect you from giant snails...
Mmhmm. Want to go back and live in a mill with a hot tub?
Bed, yes.
Night, gents!
Consider a site like http://www.gardenaction.co.uk/fruit_veg_diary/veg_planner.asp for when to plant things. You can customize it to your location. I depend on these, because I can't remember all the dates!
AftSO
I do want to go back, yes. Right now?
Nanny!John pleeeease can I have the day off. My car has frost all over it and I have to meet someone who is an ideal candidate for being buried in your allotment.
How goes work Greg?
Are you having a fun day John?
It's not too bad.
Wish I was out in the sunshine with John and the boys though.
I can understand that but I'm glad its not too bad :-)
SH - I'm probably too late, but I can write you a note if you like...
L - wish you were too. How's the paperwork mountain?
Paperwork isn't too horrific. New cases are. Might have time for a quick coffee?
Sounds good to me. Now?
Yeah, we'll, ten moons
Try again
Yeah, well ten mins
All right, be there soon. Or in ten moons, whichever comes first.
John, that's okay - if you don't date it I can use it next time I need it.
I was going to ask for it to include time off for disposal of the body, but your DI fiancé might not approve.
Well, I already said no corpses in the allotment, so you'll have to do something with it... Was the meeting bad?
Definitely no corpses buried on the allotment. But we could fill a waterbutt with acid for you, do it that way?
...going to be a bit late, Danger.
Want pizza?
Yeah, sure. Everything okay? Or...relatively okay?
Yeah, I mean, just busy. I won't be too much longer I hope.
Mycroft can make pizza dough if he wants, or we can just order in.
I'll make the dough. We have a lot of different toppings.
Thanks, Mycroft. Don't let Sherlock try to spin it out into a base. Especially not near the dogs.
Never again. Either the dogs end up wearing it or he does.
Quite. I'll be home in a bit. Nearly leaving.
Good. Mycroft's trying to teach me how to make dough. (save me)
If he helps you make dough I can show you how to make it go pizza shaped! Even if we have to do it when the dogs aren't here
No one is tossing this dough. You can show me on a flat surface.
Making dough go pizza shaped is a useful skill. But maybe you should start with small pizzas.
rsf
But Lestrade can do it on big pizzas and I've watched him loads and I bet I can do it too but I'm never allowed
You were allowed though, and then it fell on Deimos's head and Phobos tried to eat it and they ran around chasing each other and nearly tipped over the sofa. You can have another go at some point, but not tonight I'm afraid.
Sherlock, this dough won't be stretchy enough for throwing. We need to make it earlier and let it rise for longer to make it all nice and stretchy.
It takes big hands to do a big pizza. When I was smaller, all my pizza tries kept landing on the floor when they got too big. Or the cat. But after I'd practiced with salt dough a lot, I could make little pizzas with real dough. But even salt dough needs to be worked until the gluten is nice and stretchy before you can try tossing it.
rsf
Thank you, that acid filled water butt could prove extremely useful. Someone who is paid a lot of money to do a job and yet we still seem to be doing all the work.
Hope you all enjoyed your pizza and that those who weren't supposed to have any didn't manage to sneak off with it.
I'm sure as I get caught up, I will find out... how big is the allotment? with a greenhouse and blueberry bushes, it sounds like it's a bit larger than the plot my mom had in the community garden in Boston. How exciting to be picking out seeds, etc. Empty egg boxes are great for starting seedlings.
S
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